What It Is To Burn
by MissElle85
Summary: Eventual Dasey, I am re-publishing this story. Reasons inside! Enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Life With Derek, Nor Any Of The Song Lyrics I May Use As Chapter Titles, Or As My Story Title.

I stopped writing this story years ago. But recently re-read it & wanted to begin where I left off. Then I could not log into my account lol! So here I am with a new account & starting over. :)

Characters may seem a little OOC to some. Hopefully you enjoy it. I enjoy writing it :

Chapter One

"_This whole situation is incredibly typical…"_

Casey McDonald threw her large messenger bag on her bedroom floor and sighed. On this particular day school had been a drain on her. Senior year, she had realized was difficult. More than any other preceding year.

She was trying so desperately to get her excellent grades up to superior status to ensure a first-rate college in her not-so-distant future.

She dragged her bag across her carpet and sat on her bed. Leafing through her folders she once again inwardly sighed.

"Homework, and more homework…," she said aloud.

Of course she was a perfectionist and loved her school work, she also wanted, only sometimes, a real life. One where instead of sitting home alone on a Friday night, she was out at a party with friends. She'd never even experienced that, and she was eighteen now, about to go to college.

Would it be the same thing all over again? Or could she just start over?

"Who am I kidding?," she thought, "I'll always be…uninteresting."

She really had no idea where these thoughts had been coming from, but in the past few weeks they had started and wouldn't slow down. She guessed it was the fear of leaving high school and starting something so new, so foreign.

Also, she hadn't been in a serious relationship for nearly a year, and had rarely dated in the meantime. She had put all her effort into school. Now it was catching up to her. Now it was wearing her down. She wanted a boy to go to movies with, parties on the weekend, and friends who double dated.

How was this all to much to ask for?

"Dinner!" Nora called from downstairs, interrupting Casey's thoughts. She hauled herself from the bed reluctantly and headed down to dinner.

"How exciting!" she mumbled, drearily.

And so very typical.

As Nora was placing the final settings on the table Casey walked in. She glanced around the table to find George, Edwin, Lizzie, and Marti already seated, except for Derek, she noted, who's probably out with his friends…of course, she thought.

"So how was everyone's day?" Nora questioned as she took her seat at the end of the table, smiling widely.

"Great!" George exclaimed, going on about a case he was working on.

Casey just looked down concentrating on her dinner intently. Just then Derek came bounding through the front door, making as much noise as possible. Causing everyone to shift their eyes in is direction.

"Smerek's here!," Marti exclaimed loudly, as he walked in and ruffled her hair lightly, smiling.

Derek pulled out his chair and sat down, " Sorry guys, busy with schoolwork at the library, and all. You know how it is… right Casey?" He smirked, looking at Casey. He knew full well it was insult and directed at her, uncalled for. But he couldn't resist taunting her a little for her grade-grubbing ways.

"Oh please, like you ever even open your textbooks. I'm actually surprised you even know how!" Casey muttered, never looking up from her plate, but knowing he was grating her nerves on purpose.

Edwin and Lizzie just exchanged glances. All the while shaking their heads. Another night, another pointless fight.

"At least I have a life outside of Math, English, and History, unlike some people," Derek said, trying to get Casey to look up at him. Finally she did, but with a blank expression, unreadable. She wasn't going to provoke him tonight.

Casey opened her mouth to speak, but was silenced.

"Stop it you two, enough. Just eat your dinner and don't argue…for one night." George said, sighing.

"Whatever," Derek said, looking away. "I'm going out tonight anyway…"

Casey rolled her blue eyes, 'Of course he is', she thought. 'And I'm stuck here again'.

"Oh where?" George questioned.

"Just to some party with Sam and the guys. Nothing interesting really," Derek answered.

Casey wondered if she would find it as uninteresting as Derek did, if she too had parties to attend every weekend. 'Doubtful,' she thought, 'And _he_ doesn't even appreciate it.'

She began shifting her food around her plate, not really eating any of it. She finally pushed it away from her and looked toward her mom.

"Can I be excused?"

Nora looked concerned, "Sure honey, are you ok?"

"Yeah. Tired is all."

She half smiled and slid her chair away from the table. Never looking back.

Casey flopped on her bed, Staring upward at her ceiling. For some reason she just wanted to sleep.

"So another boring night at home, Case?" Derek said hovering in her doorway. Just what she needed, rude comments.

"Why don't you just leave me alone tonight?" She said not even looking in his direction.

"What kind of step-brother would I be if I did that? You're clearly just wallowing in self-pity…or maybe…you could just shut your door, if you want privacy, instead of leaving it wide open." he half smirked.

He knew she was getting beyond annoyed but didn't really care, after all that's what he wanted. But she wasn't responding outwardly.

They always did this, witty comments thrown back and forth. 'So why was this any different?,' He thought. She seemed kind of out of it and was showing amazing restraint.

"Unless you are here to tell me you have decided to move out and get as far away from me as possible, then I don't wanna hear it…" she said quietly turning over, away from him.

"O-okay," he was taken aback by this. Only mildly offensive comments from her, no chastising, no 'De-rek!.' Just her monotonous voice, not even somewhat bothered.

"No date for Klutzilla, then? No raging parties to attend this weekend?" He wanted an outburst, some emotion at all to emit from her. But still, he received nothing. He figured digging up that nickname would stir her emotions.

She continued staring at the wall beside her bed, "You have fun Derek…"

She wasn't in the mood to argue, especially with him.

He was at a loss for words. For once he had no comeback. He lifted himself from his position of leaning on her doorframe, and mumbled something she couldn't understand.

He walked away, reluctantly, and headed downstairs. The little bickering always broke up his days from being so mind-numbing. It made him feel like a breathing being, not the vapor he felt like he had become. But she had no idea.

"What the hell is her problem?" he thought. Grabbing his jacket from the coat hanger and turning the doorknob. In the three years they lived together as a blended 'family' he'd never known her to back down from an argument, even one as trivial as this.

She heard the front door slam from upstairs. And she closed her eyes. He was right, even if he hadn't exactly said it. She was a loser at home with no date, no parties, no…nothing. She was socially useless.

She reached for her school bag and pulled out her reading assignment for English. In no time she was drifting off to sleep with the book still grasped in her left hand.

"Man, what is wrong with you?" Sam said grabbing Derek by the shoulders and shaking him roughly.

The party had been going for a couple of hours now. But nothing seemed to interest Derek enough for him to care. He had wandered around for a while, talked to a few people, and had a pair of drinks, but he was clearly bored out of his mind. Not even his gaggle of female admirers were of notice to him.

The only people who really spoke to him only did it to get some attention. Maybe someone would see them talking to the best hockey player in school and it would make them seem somehow dateable? What kind of life is that?

And the girls, same fixation. Just to be accepted and well-liked. Hook up with the hockey star, and you're the next craze in high school! 'They should make banners,' he thought.

This whole thing was getting so old. And not so much fun anymore.

It had lost it's appeal months ago.

"Nothing. Tired," Derek said, dully.

"Well, get over it! We're Seniors! We're at a party with a shit ton of hot girls, just waiting for someone like us, and you are just standing over her in the corner with this dumbass look on your face like you don't even wanna be here! It's been like this the last few weeks with you. What the hell?" Sam practically shouted at Derek.

Derek shrugged, "So what Sam? This is every weekend. It's the same girls, the same people we see everyday at school…and the same ending. You know, the one where the party is broken up by the police, or a complaining neighbor. Or even better…both!" He sarcastically replied.

"I'm just bored with it, that's all," Derek said, echoing his previous thoughts. " There's absolutely nothing new here. Nothing!"

"You're Derek Venturi. Every girl here, any girl, would hook up with you…in a second," Sam motioned around the room. "What is your problem? If I was you…"

Derek immediately cracked, tired of hearing Sam's grating voice, "Look, if you were me, you'd be sick of it too. It's not worth it, and I'm starting to realize most of my so-called friends are using me. You need to realize that too."

Sam's features darkened. "Go away if you're going to be such a downer on everything. What's happened to you lately?"

"You need to wake up Sam, everyone here has an agenda, and it's only to get more popularity. Who cares anymore?"

Sam replied by taking another drink from his bottle, and turning his head in the direction of the nearest female.

"Well, whatever dude. I'm going to enjoy myself. Go home and cry yourself to sleep or… something," Sam said and walked away toward a blonde girl with a cheap light beer glued to her hand.

She was instantly all over Sam. Of course, he _was_ on the hockey team too and friends with Derek, the most popular guy at school. And any girl looking to up her reputation, even a little, would be receptive to his attention. 'Was he as blind as he was brainless?,' Derek thought.

Derek had the sudden urge to calmly walk over and punch Sam in his condescending face. But instead just searched for the exit, and grabbed his keys from his pocket in his leather jacket.

He looked around one last time before walking out across the lawn, littered with cans, and miscellaneous trash, out toward his car.

"Find your own way home, Sam." He mumbled before starting the ignition and heading away from the party. And to his own house.

The sound of the front door slamming shut awoke Casey from her dreams abruptly. She shot straight up, dropping her book, that had been secure in her hand, on the floor with a thud.

"What?" She said aloud, glancing over at her bedside clock. It was flashing red numbers reading only 11:30pm. "That cannot be Derek home…before curfew."

She stood up and peeked out her door just in time to see Derek's fuming expression as he turned into his room in a huff.

Disregarding this, she shut her door and crawled back into bed. She could hear rustling and various jarring noises from across the hall. 'How inconsiderate can he be, making as much noise as possible…some people actually want to sleep,' she thought.

"He's such an inconsiderate jerk."

Derek had closed his door swiftly and stood in the middle of the chaos he called his bedroom. Not knowing why but he suddenly felt the need to rearrange his room, entirely. And hard labor, such as moving furniture, was definitely not his favorite past time. But he wanted something to do, anything to release the anger. This would do for now.

He furiously pushed his desk away from the wall and began moving his bed in it's place.

He threw away all the pieces of trash littered around his room. All the empty cans of soda, half-eaten food…gone. Then he threw all his clothes in his closet in a massive pile. But much shuffling and reorganizing only seemed to jumble it up to a shoddier condition.

There was still much to be done to make it clean. To make it useful again.

"Who am I kidding…I can't even do this right," he said, looking around at the enormous mess he had brought about.

He ran his hands through his light brown hair and rested them atop his head. Surveying the damage of his room now, he felt exhausted. All this confusion, from his friends and his entire life he had created his entire high school career, was causing him to fall apart. He didn't know how to deal, but how could he change it?

He just wanted to feel less inadequate in his mind. Sure, outwardly he was arrogant, and egotistical. But Derek believed he was only really fantastic at hockey. And that comforted him, knowing he was the best. The ultimate. Out of all the boring day-to-day there was always hockey.

Even if his life was becoming a wreck, there was still hockey. An maybe a little arguing with Casey, he inwardly laughed. That was always fun.

Derek yawned, closing his eyes as his head hit the pillow.

"Well, Monday morning can't get here soon enough…," he groaned.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

"_Maybe you're going to be the one that saves me…"_

Before class on Monday morning Casey pulled her books out of her locker and stuffed a few more in place of the others. She was contemplating cleaning out her locker soon. She did it once every week, but why not twice, she deliberated. 'What else do I have to do? Certainly nothing of importance'

"Casey!," Emily shouted, walking down the school hallway swiftly, practically speed walking. She was waving her hand erratically and grinning from ear to ear.

Casey closed her locker and looked up. After this weekend she was far from exuberant. Sitting home staring at her walls, or doing homework, sometimes rotating the two, was not her idea of a good time. What was her idea of a good time? She had no idea anymore.

"Hey Emily," she said, trying to feign excitement. She was clearly missing out on something incredible, judging from the way Emily was carrying on. 'If this is about her Derek crush again, so help me…' she mentally fumed.

But instead Casey simply grinned, "What's going on, Em?"

Emily clasped her arm through Casey's and pulled her away from the lockers, heading down the hall toward first period.

"Okay," Emily began, " So I hear there's a new guy at school, and I went on the hunt, and Casey, oh my god, he is amazing! You have to see him. So hot! His name's Andrew"

Casey was trying not to laugh. But Emily had peaked her interest slightly, she had to admit. A new guy? Hmm. Someone who didn't know her. Didn't have a pre-conceived idea about her. No Klutzilla, No grade-grubber. Perfect. Maybe this would make up for her last few weeks of stay-at-home repetitive hell. Maybe this guy could pull her out of this self-made barrier she had constructed recently.

"Em, have you put this Andrew guy in your notebook yet?" Casey questioned, and knowing full well the answer. Emily wrote every boy in the school's stats, personal history, and dating habits in the notebook.

Emily jokingly rolled her eyes, pulling the product in question out of her bag, "Of course, Case. I'm on top of things. Always. This notebook has everyone's dating history and then some."

Casey laughed, noting it's tattered edges, probably from over-use, "Well, it is helpful when you need it."

"I don't know a lot about him yet, but I will. Trust me," Emily replied, in all seriousness.

They finally made their way to their first class of the day and walked in. They weren't two steps inside when Emily quietly gasped behind her. She quickly hauled herself and Casey into their respective seats.

"What is it now," Casey asked, wide-eyed, pushing her brown hair from her shoulders.

"He's in our class. Ahh no way!" Emily exclaimed.

"Where?"

"Two seats over from you," Emily quickly motioned to her left with her thumb.

Their biology teacher, Mr. Clark, entered the classroom then. He began scribbling out words and numbers across the blackboard and talking about the day's work. But Casey was far from listening, so unlike her. She was attempting to catch a quick look at the new student. If only to shut Emily up, before they both got detention for talking during class.

Casey peeked over her other classmates, craning her neck, trying to get a glimpse of _him_. Andrew. What was the big deal honestly, he was just another boy. Then…her eyes immediately fell on perfection. Dark hair, dark eyes, amazing, toned arms. Oh, Emily was right. He is…is…

"Miss McDonald, is something more interesting to you than your assignment?" Mr. Clark asked, tapping his fingers on his desk.

"Umm," she squeaked, embarrassed. "No sir."

"Get to work." He said sternly.

Andrew momentary looked in her direction, locking eyes with her, and lightly smiling. Casey sunk lower into her seat, pulling her books and paper out of her bag slowly. 'Great,' she thought, 'Now I've been humiliated in front of the new guy, great way to start my day.'

So much for starting a fresh day with something new.

-/

"Derek!" Sam called out, running to catch up with him after first period English. Derek turned and glanced in his direction. Great. This early, he didn't feel like dealing with Sam, or any of his friends. Especially after this weekend.

"What happened to you Friday night?" Sam questioned, not really caring to hear the answer. "I needed a ride home…but anyway, I met this amazing, beautiful girl…"

Blah, Blah, Blah. It was a blur of words coming from Sam's obnoxious, over-zealous mouth. Derek was staring at him in awe of how clueless he was. Did he not remember the conversation from the party? How he had said he was tired of all of…this.

"Listen, Sam. I've really got to go. I'm not in the mood to talk to you about any of the _events_ from this weekend."

"Huh? Where? You never go to second period. It's crazy Ms. Bozzell. She hates you. She gives you detention for just showing up, man!" Sam lightly chuckled. It _was_ true.

"Yeah…" Derek said, uninterested in explaining to Sam much of anything. He began to absentmindedly sift through his backpack. He didn't have anywhere to be. He just was sick and tired of everyone at the moment. And silently wondering why, this weekend, he had wished for Monday

"Oh hey, Derek, there's a new kid. He just started today. Hear he's a hockey player. One of the best from his last school."

This caught Derek's attention. "New kid?" He asked, stopping and looking up from his bag.

"Yeah, and coach said the guy…uhh I think his name is Andrew, wants to try out," Sam shifted his backpack on his shoulder.

"…Well good luck to him," Derek spoke arrogantly, smirking. If he could do one thing, it was play hockey. No one was better at this school. No one. He wasn't going to let some little asshole come in, thinking he runs the place, trying to snatch hockey away. Just when he had come to the conclusion hockey was his one safety net. His one steadfast haven.

"Yeah right Derek. You don't want him taking away your status, your girls, your…," Sam kept going.

Derek pulled his hand from his backpack, "Sam, do you remember a thing I said this weekend? I don't care about any of that anymore. I'm so over it, dude. It's dead."

"Yeah, well that's what you say now," Sam began. "But when this kid starts trying to take all your glory away, including hockey, just wait, you'll want it back."

Derek rolled his eyes, "Sam, I hardly think he's going to…"

Then Andrew appeared from around the corner diverting his and Sam's attention. All the girls eyed him for his looks, the guys eyed him for his status as the new competition. It was the oddest moment.

Derek looked around him at everyone's expressions and he immediately wanted to burst into fits of laughter. 'What the hell, is this some kind of cheesy, slow-motion, teen movie entrance?' he considered.

This Andrew kid sure had it down. The walk. The looks. The life of parties, girls, and popularity. Derek had it and didn't want it anymore. But was he supposed to simply hand it over to this…walking Ken doll.. _And_ he wanted to play hockey? Pretty boy wanted to be the best?

'Oh, please,' the sarcasm practically saturated Derek's thoughts. 'he has no idea what he's in for.'

Casey watched Andrew, from her position outside of second period, as he strode down the hall with all the confidence of a young man who knew all the girls wanted him. His apparent arrogance reminded her of a certain step-brother she'd rather forget. As he got closer she froze.

Where was he heading? Not towards her?

"Hi," Andrew's voice snapped her back into reality. Why was he talking to her? Hadn't she thoroughly embarrassed herself in front of him just last period?

Casey finally piped up, "Hi." It was all she could muster from her lungs. She was in too much shock.. She clutched her bag tightly with her right hand

"My name is Andrew. I just transferred here and don't really know anyone. I saw you in first period though. You seemed nice and smart. Mr. Clark seems tough and I'm so bad at Biology" he smiled widely at Casey, causing her to turn to mush. "I bet you're really good at it, huh? You seemed to know all the answers to his questions."

"Yeah well, I study a lot," she said, immediately regretting it. 'Why would I say that? That's like announcing you're a loser in flashing lights on a blimp flying above the school.'

She kept going trying to fix her statement, "I mean, I study sometimes. I can have fun too. I'm not a crazy grade-grubbing obsessive compulsive or anything…," she realized she was digging a hole and stopped.

He just stood looking at her, and still smiling. His dark eyes were glistening, "I highly doubt you're that," he finally said. "But it would be great if maybe you like to study, a little, cause I could use some help. Some time we could get together… and study?"

Casey's eyes virtually fell out onto the floor. She couldn't believe this. The new guy was asking her out. Well, not technically, but close enough. Studying. Dating. Whatever. He could be her savior from this blah, boring life she was leading. He was parties, he was popularity. Yes, he definitely could save her.

"Yes, sounds great. When?" She said, grinning widely.

"Maybe tomorrow? After school?" he directed his voice to Casey.

"Yeah. Definitely."

"See ya tomorrow then," he grinned and turned to leave.

Casey smiled and waved goodbye.

She had to find Emily. _This_ was going in the notebook for certain.

The front door to the Venturi-McDonald household swung open widely Monday afternoon, as Casey walked through the entrance. She turned her head toward the living room, where Lizzie and Edwin sat on the sofa, watching TV.

"Hey Casey," Lizzie said, not even looking over at her. "Where have you been?"

"Hey Liz. Oh I was just at the library." Casey said. "Hey Edwin. So how was school you two?"

"Good." They both replied in unison.

They were completely engrossed in the program on TV. Casey smiled slightly and headed upstairs, trying not to interrupt them further from the 'brain-cell frying device', as she called it.

When she reached her bedroom door, Derek suddenly walked out of his room, letting the door close behind him, and almost running directly into Casey. She was surprised to find him there. He wasn't usually home after school. He was with friends or something.

"Watch where you're going…" he said, lightly brushing past her. He had nothing to do tonight. Not with his new slogan of 'no parties and no pathetic, manipulating friends'.

Casey grabbed his arm, stopping him from moving further, "Hey, listen I have plans tomorrow afternoon. And I would appreciate it if you would make yourself invisible for the evening."

He shook his arm free from her grasp, "Plans tomorrow? Finally got a date? Never would have guessed it."

"Well, I don't want you here. You're just a nuisance, and I have a study date." she said gesturing with her right arms. "And this guy won't have anything to say to you anyway. He's really nice and considerate, and interested in learning. You're polar opposites. So don't think you're going to be playing Babe Raider with him or trying to turn him against me. You won't even meet him if I have anything to do with it."

"Yeah. He'll figure you out soon enough, being perfect is hard," he smirked, folding his arms across his chest, and thinking of how much fun it was to annoy Casey. "What's this guy's name anyway? Since, I'm guessing I don't know him…and seeing the measures you're taking to ensure I'm not here tomorrow, I never will." He feigned sadness.

"You don't know him. He's new here," she said turning her eyes downward. "His name is Andrew."

"What?!" Derek exclaimed, causing her vision to shift toward his face. "The Hockey player? Pretty boy Andrew?"

"The what? Hockey Player?" she said, eyes wide. "You _know_ him?"

"I know _of _him. He is NOT coming here. No way in hell is he coming in this house if I have anything to do with it…he's trying to take over my hockey team and…," he began, when Casey interrupted him.

"Derek! How can you know him, he's new here. You such an ass! You're judging the guy before you've met him…you _haven't_ met him yet have you?" She asked, worried Derek had already sunk his claws into him, ruining her reputation in the process.

"No, I haven't, but he's no good. I'm telling you."

Casey rolled her eyes, "And you would know because?"

Derek wanted to shake some sense into her little body, "I know his type. He's not coming over here to_study_ with you Case. He doesn't want to _date_ you either. God, it's so obvious. I can't believe you're being so naïve. You're just looking for someone to save you from this boring, drab life you have here. He's no good."

Hurt reflected in her eyes, "Why would he ask to come here then?"

"Umm…he's a hockey player looking to take over the team. I'm the best player our team has…come on Case, I know you're good at math. You can put two and two together can't you? He's only coming here cause he knows I'm you're step-brother, and he's doing it to try to throw me off. Ever heard of keeping your enemies close? This is the same thing."

Casey's hurt immediately turned to rage, "Are you kidding me? Wow. I knew you were arrogant. But this, this is…I don't even know. He's going to be here, and you're not. That's all there is to it. So make it happen and disappear."

With that she turned and breezed through her bedroom door, closing it in Derek's face. He just stood with his arms by his sides now. 'How can she be so stupid? He's using her. It's so clear,' he thought. And more importantly, he told himself, the guy was making a play for his position on the team.

"No. No way is he going to be here tomorrow and I'm not leaving," He stared at Casey's closed door.

"Sorry, Case," he said, smirking, and walking back to his room and closing his door. Tomorrow would be interesting to say the least.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"_Anything but silence, anything you say, will stay in my head for days…"_

Tuesday flew by at school for Casey. She was excited and little anxious about tonight. Everything had to be right. Derek wouldn't be there. Her family would let Andrew and herself study without hassling them. Everything was going to be great. At least that's what she kept telling herself.

She was simply hoping for the best.

The afternoon bell rang letting the student body out of the last class of the day. The kids filed down the hall, making their ways to the cars and buses respectively. But Casey made her way to Andrew's locker. He wasn't there yet so she waited for him. Glancing at her watch, she thought, 'He wouldn't stand me up would he?'

Then he appeared beaming at her with his sparkling brown eyes. She grinned, feeling brainless for even thinking he would do such a thing as stand her up. He was different than that. He had to be.

"Hey Casey!" He walked closer to her and leaned against his locker. "So, uhh, are you ready to go?"

She smiled once again, "Yeah let's get out of here."

The car ride to her house consisted of learning all she could about Andrew Taylor. He was so open and talkative about his past. She listened intently as he told her about how he grew up with his parents and little sister, how he loved hockey and had played since was a kid. They talked so much about little unimportant things, but things that made up a person. She felt like she knew him already, so well.

She told him all about her childhood, the divorce of her parents, and the subsequent marriage of her mom and George. Purposefully she left out a few details. The parts where she was a social outcast when she first moved here. And the fact that she hadn't completely shed that image.

He was perfect, she thought. Just the guy she needed. He wasn't going to put her down or make her feel bad about herself. He told her she was pretty. He told her she was smart. Andrew wasn't just some guy, he was amazing, to her. And she hadn't known him, but all of two days. Things could only get better.

When they reached her driveway she spoke out, "Oh, here it is. This is my house."

"Nice place," he responded as they turned onto the concrete path.

As she opened her car door and they made their way to the front door she decided she should warn him, "My family can be crazy, so you know, prepare yourself," she laughed, "But you'll get to meet everyone who matters, then we can get to studying."

He smiled down at her as she walked through the door. But her face quickly contorted into a frown as she walked into the foyer.

"Hi, what took you so long getting home, Case?" Derek said, coming down the stairs, smirking. "Lots of after school bookwork? I know you weren't with any friends. Being you don't have a lot of those…"

"And…who are you?" he asked rudely, turning his eyes to Andrew. This kid was walking in his house like he belonged there. That had to change…immediately. He would make him feel unwelcome.

"I'm Andrew Taylor, Casey's friend. I just moved to your town, new to your school. Are you Casey's brother?" he said reaching out his hand, in order to shake Derek's. "We haven't met."

Derek simply stood with his arms folded, unmoving. He looked Andrew over from his white sneakers to his preppy clothes to his perfectly styled hair. He sneered, 'How could he not know me?' He was Derek Venturi. Everyone knew who he was in that school.

Casey eyed him, unblinking. She knew he practically hated her, but why would he do this? She thought he understood to stay away tonight. She felt like she wanted to cry. He was going to ruin this. He would, she knew it.

"Oh, hello," Nora called out as she entered the living room. "Casey who's your friend?" She hadn't even heard her mother speaking to her, "Casey?"

Casey's eyes were transfixed on Derek, who was staring at Andrew, giving him the once over. Nora stood puzzled looking between the two.

Andrew cleared his throat, breaking the silence. "Hi, Ms. McDonald, I'm Andrew. I go to school with Casey. I came over study with her. I'm new here so she has been nice enough to help me fit in and get adjusted to things."

Derek rolled his eyes, he wanted to laugh out loud. This guy was using all the tricks. 'He must have read Impress The Parents 101,' he thought and smiled at his own sarcasm. He stopped and shifted his feet, when he noticed Casey's ice glare.

"Well, that's our Casey. She's so smart and helpful." Nora said. "Come on in. We are eating dinner in a few minutes. You could join us, then study afterwards?"

Andrew looked at Casey waiting for an answer, "Sure." she said, reluctantly. They dropped their school bags at the door and headed to the dining area.

But Derek stepped between Andrew and herself on the way to the dinner table, causing her to bristle. "I thought you were going out tonight, De-rek!" she said through gritted teeth, as she walked behind him.

She spoke so low, no one but Derek could hear her clearly. "Sorry Case, I find this much more entertaining. And I really, really want to meet your new so-called-boyfriend. Since he wants my life so bad." He whispered over his shoulder.

"Oh please, you have no proof of that. Just what your friends said. You're such an bigheaded, narcissistic…"

Casey stopped mid-sentence as they reached the table. She quickly recovered and made the rounds introducing Andrew to George, Marti, Lizzie and Edwin.

Marti sat next to Andrew, looking up at him, smiling. "I like you, actually." she said.

"I'm glad. Is that good?" he laughed looking down at her.

"That's very good." she nodded, beginning to eat.

Dinner was going very well, as they settled into polite conversation. No one, not even Derek, had insulted Andrew or embarrassed her, Casey thought. That is, until George had to begin his line of questioning.

"So Andrew," George said, between bites of dinner. "Do you play sports?"

'Oh no,' Casey felt like slapping a piece of tape over George's mouth. 'Here it comes.'

"Yes." Andrew said. "I play hockey."

"Really, so does Derek. He's captain. Are you planning of trying out for the team?" George questioned, oblivious.

"Well-,"Andrew began, but was cut off by Derek, who had been silent for too long.

"Of course he is. Aren't you _Andrew_?" he said his name with such malice, it all but dripped from his tongue.

"Umm, I, I'm, I doubt it, actually. I'm trying something new here. Not really sports anymore. I'm trying to concentrate on my academics for now. Ya know, for college?" he answered. Derek sat shocked. He could have sworn this guy wanted to take over his life. And take over his hockey. Everything Sam had said had seeped into his brain, he guessed. Hadn't he promise not to listen to his dim-witted friends anymore?

Casey glowered at Derek "Yeah so there's your answer. He doesn't want your stupid team. Happy now? You were wrong."

"What is wrong with you lately? You'll see I was right about the other things I said, maybe hockey, maybe not, but everything else is true. It'll just take some time. I'm _not_ wrong, Miss Perfect." Derek answered her abruptly, taking offense on being called out in front of Andrew. He dropped his fork into his plate, with a clang. He wasn't hungry any longer.

Andrew just looked between them, confused.

Nora and George looked across the table at one another, silently asking the other to say something to stop an argument. George opened his mouth to speak, but he was interrupted.

"You _are _wrong. I'll prove it. Andrew do you want to start our Biology work now?" Casey pushed her full plate away from her, the food not even touched.

Andrew folded his napkin onto the tabled, "Uhh sure, Casey. Whenever you are."

She asked if they could be excused, and stood, brusquely exiting the room, pulling Andrew out with her. He apologized quickly to Nora and George, before rounding the corner to the living room.

Edwin grinned at Derek, "Good job, bro. You really made Casey mad now."

"Good. Like I care anyway," he huffed, "I'm going out." Derek stood up from his seat and walked through the back door, slamming it shut behind him. He had nowhere to go so he just stood outside. He needed some air. Just some fresh air.

And Andrew, he was considerably baffled by the behavior he had seen at dinner. He felt left out of the conversation, that was clearly involving him.

"Casey, what was that about? You seemed really defensive in there. And I think your brother hates me now..." he laughed, as they sat on the couch.

"Step-brother…" she interrupted, "He hates everyone, but himself. And he has a lot of hang-ups, ignore him. He wasn't even supposed to be here. I specifically asked him not to be-"

"It's ok. I've seen the over protective act before. He probably just doesn't want you hanging with someone who he thinks will hurt you, or wants to take his hockey team away. At least that's what it sounds like," He said.

Casey smiled at his naïve notion of Derek caring about her. "He definitely isn't over protective. He's a jerk. And you and me, we're just…studying…right?" She asked looking at him as they pulled their books out of their bags and began to pick apart papers.

"Well, yeah for now, but I kind of like you…you know…so maybe more than studying, eventually," he stuttered, tripping over his words nervously.

"Yeah…hopefully" Casey blushed, opening her notebook and leaning over to begin their study time. He shifted a little uncomfortably.

"So some guys at school told me about a party this weekend, Saturday night. I don't know if you'd want to , but if you'd like to come I'd really like-"

"I'd love to!" she exclaimed. "You have no idea how much I want to come! That would be great."

"Yeah," he smiled. "It's at this guy Sam's house. You probably know him."

"Oh, umm, yeah. We kinda dated for a while, but it was a couple of years ago. He's Derek's best friend."

Andrew looked concerned, "Do you think it would be a problem if you came with me then? I mean if you feel uncomfortable…"

Casey slightly laughed, "No, no. It's fine with Sam and I. We're friends now."

"I meant with Derek. He seems like he doesn't like me too much, honestly."

"Well that's his problem isn't it?" she said indignantly. This would do good to irritate Derek, and show him she could fit in with his crowd too. That she wasn't a loser. Of course she wanted to go to be with Andrew and have a good time on the weekend for once. But going to spite Derek was just a plus.

She hadn't wanted Derek here tonight, but he was. Derek wouldn't want her at the party and she would be there. 'So Perfect,' she thought, amused at how things had turned out.

"Alright then. So Saturday? Sounds great!"

"Yeah," She wanted to jump up and hug him. She was finally going to get into the 'in' crowd. Going to parties, and having a better, more interesting life. He _was_ going to save her.

"So I guess we should get to studying, huh?" he laughed, and Casey opened her notebook, beginning to explain the biology assignment expertly.

"Thanks for dinner," Andrew said, as he grabbed his coat from the hanger near the door. Casey stood beside him, looking at her family. "I had a really good time meeting you all."

"Oh you're welcome," Nora grinned from her seat on the couch..

"Anytime. You're welcome to come back and have dinner with us soon" George said.

"Well, thanks again," he waved goodbye and started to open the door. "Oh, I forgot my biology folder upstairs! I've gotta get it…"

Casey stopped him, "No, no. I'll go get it for you. Just a sec." She disappeared up the stairs.

"Can you tell Casey I am waiting for her outside?" he asked Nora and George.

"Sure. Goodnight, again." they answered in unison.

Andrew stepped outside into the cold air. Pulling his jacket tighter and stuffing his hands into his pockets. He didn't see Derek standing on the corner of the porch, leaning against the railing. Perfect opportunity.

"Leaving?" Derek said flatly, startling him purposefully, causing him to somewhat jump.

Andrew took a deep breath and composed himself. "Wow. I didn't even see you there. Yeah. I'm heading out."

Derek nodded his head. Still giving Andrew no hint of conversation.

"Listen Derek," he began. "I hope we can get along. I'm not trying out for hockey so I want you to know, I don't want to take over your team." Derek sighed. He was so tired of hearing about that.

Andrew kept talking, "And I know you're probably just being the over-protective brother, but I really like Casey and I'm not looking to hurt her. You don't have anything to worry about…"

"What?!" Derek's head snapped up. "First of all, I'm her step-brother, and second I don't care who Casey dates, or studies with, or whatever you're calling it. I'm not being over-protective. We don't even get along."

"Yeah okay, but I know the older brother thing can be tricky. I have a sister," he replied. "I would be freaked if some guy was coming over and wanting to take her out. I'd want to know all about him and why he was there. But I mean, Casey is special. She's not like the other girls I've met here."

"Yeah, like the other girls know how to have fun," Derek muttered. "Casey doesn't"

"But there's this thing about her. Like I know she would be a devoted, faithful person." the words spilled from Andrew's lips. "Just from the few days I've known her. She has this light around her. She's beautiful and has a big heart. I can't say enough good things seriously. And I'm not just trying to get on your good side, as her brother."

Derek suddenly wished he would stop referring to him as her brother. He was her _step_-brother. Was that so hard to understand? And he thought he knew Casey so well, after only being acquainted with her for a few days at the most. He was delusional. And he was going to let Andrew know it.

"You know, you sure are…" but Derek was stopped from going on as the front door swung open.

Casey's eyes darted back and forth between the two boys. She wanted to know what had been said, why they were talking and if her chances had been completely ruined with her new friend. Andrew just smiled at Casey, and she lightly returned the expression.

Derek suddenly felt a tinge of jealousy. And why? It had to be all that big heart, devotion speech Andrew had droned on about for the past few minutes. Nothing else.

"Thanks Case," Andrew reached for his folder, taking it from her. "I guess I'll see you at school then?"

Derek couldn't believe what he was hearing. 'Since when does he call her Case?' he thought.

"And Saturday too," Casey was saying as she headed out to walk Andrew to his car. At this point Derek lost the bulk of the conversation between the two. But he watched the interaction. Casey laughed and smiled, her hand rested on Andrew's arm. They looked perfect together. He reached his arm around her back and hugged her goodbye, as she lightly kissed his cheek.

Derek saw it then. He was witnessing what Andrew had just ten minutes before spoke of. It was the light around her. The warm smile, the laughter. He never saw it, because he never caused it. This Andrew kid brought it out, and made it beautiful.

He felt sick suddenly but he had no understanding of why. Andrew was well-mannered and polite. Nothing like what Derek had become. Casey hated him. She enjoyed Andrew's company. She didn't cringe when he walked in the room. Andrew had spoken the words and unwittingly awoken him to Casey's many assets

Derek wanted to see it for himself. He wanted to be the cause of her light. To be on the receiving end of her goodness. To have someone devoted to him. And not just for one night, like all these useless girls he was used to. The feeling was so foreign, he chalked it up to wanting to feel superior to Andrew. To prove that he could also bring out the beauty in Casey. To establish he was better, the best.

Or maybe this was just coming from the fact he had been out of his circle of friends for a few days. He had decided to give up on the party scene, that had to be why out of the blue Casey's untainted loyalty to Andrew seemed so enticing. So inviting to him.

But little did he know, the need to feel a cut above and giving up on the weekend incidents, had nothing to do with this. He didn't care to admit but that was the not the circumstances at all. This was completely different. Completely.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"_It's a silly time to learn to swim when you start to drown…"_

"Emily, I can't believe I'm finally invited to a party like this! And only one more day. I'm so happy today's Friday!" Casey exclaimed, nearly clapping her hands in excitement. The bell had just rung to release everyone for the weekend.

She had experienced the most amazing week with Andrew. They had begun hanging out everyday after school, eating lunch together, and talking on the phone when they weren't together. She had completely blocked the night of the study date out of her mind. She wanted to disregard all the problems that had arisen that night. Including the problem Derek seemed to have with Andrew.

"Well, Casey, it's about time one of us got in the popular crowd. Maybe you can find a way for me in too?" Emily laughed.

"He's just incredible. I can't believe out of everyone he chose me to hang out with. And I know everyone thinks he's just using me, but…"

"_Everyone_ Casey? It's just Derek that put that in your head. Don't even listen to him." Emily sighed.

Casey shrugged her shoulders and pulled her books closer to her chest. She had successfully avoided Derek for the last few days since Andrew was at the house. She was still livid with him about everything. Consistently, when she knew Derek was home she made herself scarce. She didn't want to ruin this pleasant feeling she had by arguing futilely with him.

And to be honest, Derek's implication that Andrew was only using her hurt her more than anything else.

"Yeah, I know. He's only trying to agitate me, but it still upsets me no matter who it's coming from. Even Derek," she said.

"All I'm saying is don't start caring what Derek has to say now. You have a good thing going with Andrew. Don't mess it up cause your step brother is an inconsiderate ass." Emily smiled at her, lightly bumping her shoulder. "You're going to have an amazing time this weekend."

Casey grinned widely, "Yeah, I will. I definitely will. And this is my perfect opportunity to infuriate Derek. He wouldn't leave the other night at dinner just to spite me. When I show up to this party he is going to freak. Kodak moment, without a doubt"

"Oh, I'd kill to see how this is going to go down," Emily laughed, as they walked to their cars, smiling.

The days following Casey's study date with Andrew went on without delay. Derek noticed she was walking on cloud nine most of the time. Suddenly it was if she had awakened from the slumber she had been in, and was smiling and having a good time again. He saw the open, sincerity that had been enlightened to him just a few nights before, while watching Casey from the porch.

And it was all because of Andrew.

Andrew.

"_Andrew_." Derek stood against his locker on Friday afternoon, his fixed on Andrew and Casey from down the hall. He was still attempting to drag up excuses to detest Andrew, not matter how implausible. "This guy is a complete tool. What does she see in him? She's walking around like she's happiness embodied. And it's entirely obvious she's being used, for what reason I'm not sure yet, but I'm am going to find out what he thinks he's…"

"Derek!" Sam smacked him in the arm, knocking him into the locker door. "You've got to stop, man. This is all you've talked about for three days straight. Haven't you realized he's got no reason to ruin your life or use Casey? I don't even know where you got that idea anyway."

Derek's head spun toward Sam, "Uh, lets' think back…from you, dumbass! You told me all that stuff and now you've conveniently forgotten. Sure."

"Well, yeah but Casey seems to like him. At least it'll get her outta you're way for a while. No more nagging, right?"

"Yeah, I guess," Derek agreed, halfheartedly. "But you should have heard the way he talked about her the other night. Going on and on about her being _faithful_ and her big heart. Like he knows her. _And_ he called her Case. He's only been here, what? A week? Plus he kept referring to me as her brother, saying I was over protective. Yeah, it made me want to close my fingers around his throat," he gestured with his hands.

Sam shut his locker and the two began walking toward the cars, "You know, Derek, I don't know what the big deal is. Try to get to know the guy. He might not be half bad. He's coming to the party Saturday night at my house."

"What party?" Derek questioned, opening his car door. "You never told me about any party. No one has actually…," he was silently wondering why his popularity had suddenly waned. Probably cause everyone was hung up on the new kid, he thought.

"Yeah. I did invite you. It was probably lost somewhere in between you complaining about Andrew and Casey or you complaining about Casey and Andrew."

"Hilarious, really," Derek frowned. "Well, I'm not going to any party. I've given up the scene. No more. But have fun socializing with the enemy. I can't believe you invited the guy that is trying to take over my status at this school, by the way."

"Whatever. You're the one who's so big on giving up your status and the no party rules, dude. He can't help it if people like him. He's a cool kid actually. But, hey, don't come, just know, you're going to miss a good one. Lots of girls, lots of drinking. Lots of _everything_."

"That's too bad," Derek pretended to care, climbing inside his vehicle and shutting the door.

"See ya Monday then, I guess," Sam shouted as he sprinted toward his car.

Derek turned the radio up as loud as the volume would take it, and sped away. Finally some weekend peace and not having to see Andrew's face for two entire days. Not even hearing his name from everyone's lips would be very nice. Very nice indeed.

Derek arrived home, hurrying up the stairs to his room. He just wanted to lay on his bed, sleep, and forget about this past week. It had been a nightmare. And his one problem wouldn't release itself from his brain.

His entire world was spinning off it's axis. He was drowning. He had no understanding of why he was feeling the things he suddenly felt. Casey had completely taken over his mind. The entire Andrew situation was a mess. He didn't understand why he suddenly cared so much. Andrew had proven that he wasn't using Casey, by spending practically every waking moment with her. So that wasn't it. Not anymore.

He collapsed onto his bed, closing his eyes, and running his hands over his face. Trying, and failing, to push all the images of Casey and Andrew from his head. The pictures were flashes of her smiling, her kissing Andrew's cheek, the look of affection Andrew had when talking of Casey. It was all driving him up the wall.

Derek wasn't the polite one. He wasn't the thoughtful, selfless one. No, he was, bigheaded and narcissistic, as Casey had so bluntly put it. Maybe she was right.

How did this new guy do it? He was here only days and had turned her into a different person. Someone Derek could see. And At last he did see her. Her tenderness and her warmth. Why did Andrew get to have that from her?

'Of course, _I_ don't want her…' Derek thought, trying to rationalize these feelings.. 'Just someone…_like_her.' But Andrew wouldn't get her. He wasn't going to have what Derek didn't. No way. Derek would have to change his ways. And fast.

Late Friday afternoon, Casey lay on her bed, headphones over her ears, eyes closed. She was tired after a very eventful week. She felt like she was in a new life.

Well, except for the fact that she still lived in the house also inhabited by Derek.

But she couldn't complain. She lay staring at her ceiling thinking. Thinking about the party tomorrow night. She had finally figured out the outfit, shoes, the makeup. The entire works. She had waited to long to be invited to something like this to ruin it. The excitement was running through her veins.

Nothing could take this away. Nothing…

She faintly heard a knock on her door, through the music. She stood and reached for the handle, "Yeah…"

She was met with Derek's smiling face, as she shut off her music. "What's going on? Why are you smiling? What did you do to me now?"

"What do you mean?" he said, pushing past her, and into her room. "Can't I be happy?" he seated himself in her computer chair, propping up his feet. She was stared in wonder at the audacity he had. He waltzed in as if nothing had happened, like he didn't try to ruin her date with Andrew and insult him mere days ago. Like he didn't insult her by insinuating Andrew was using her.

She wouldn't have this. No.

"You do realize I'm not talking to you, right?" she said still standing, door open , hand firmly gripping the knob.

"Yeah, and about that. See, I can't annoy you if you won't talk to me. So this won't do," he smirked. He had to remind himself to be nicer. He wasn't used to this…with Casey. He really didn't know how to be anything but bothersome toward her.

Casey tried to remain calm, "Well, I don't want to ruin my day and argue with you, so if you would please leave," she said, wrapping her fingers around his wrist pulling him from the chair. He stood up, but didn't budge from his position.

"Why are you so happy anyway? Andrew?" he questioned in involuntary annoyance, looking at her eyes, as she finally let her hand fall from his arm. "You barely know him, Casey. He's a piece of work, that one. He had a lot to say about you. Don't you want to know what he told me?" Derek was fully intending on fabricating a story about everything Andrew had said. Just to pry her away from him.

"No," Casey answered, quickly. "You'll lie to me. I trust him, he'd never say bad things to you about me."

Derek sneered, "You trust him more than me? Unbelievable. You've known him barely a few days!"

But she was right, he noted, he was going to lie. Even if it meant placing a frown on her face, instead of a smile. He hated that she was choosing Andrew over him. Even involving something as trivial as this.

She quietly countered, "And in those few days he has been nothing but polite and chivalrous. And in the last few years, you have been the absolute opposite of both of those things. Give me one reason why I shouldn't trust him?" her eyes radiated disgust.

Derek had nothing to say about Andrew. He didn't know him. He realized this wasn't about Andrew. This was Casey. She was the problem here. His problem. Again, he was causing her to feel miserable. Not blissful and beaming. There was no light around her, like Andrew had pointed out, when he spoke to her. Only the lamp on her dressing table gave off any glow.

The night she and Andrew walked to his car, Derek had seen it. Her eyes became a more brilliant blue and sparkled. 'It's amazing,' he thought, 'All it takes is one person to bring it out.'

This wasn't a superiority contest with Andrew anymore. This was a contest with himself. He wanted…no, needed to make her feel something like that when she looked at him. Even if it was one moment, one instance of happiness. He didn't know where it was coming from. Too much time spent in this house with her recently, perhaps?

He had to be gentle, more concerned with her feelings. He was desperately trying to hold back his thoughts.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and tilted his head up, starting at the ceiling, he clenched his teeth, forcing out a few unselfish words. "He's probably great, Case. I'll stop trying to make him into something he's probably not. Truce."

Casey warily eyed him, suspicious of his sudden change in tone, "O-ok. That was quite the speedy turn around. Are you alright?"

"Yeah. I'm, uhh, kind of, you know….," his vision moved from the floor to her eyes, he couldn't look at her. "S-sorry."

She softly smiled, and tucked her hair behind her ear. "Thanks." She couldn't help but be slightly annoyed with him still.

It was so much easier to hate him. It made her forget about the times he was thoughtful or kind toward her, if she loathed him. She didn't know how to trust him or his fleeting moments of kindness. They usually came back to haunt her at the worst possible time. But when he said things like that, she found it rather difficult to loathe him so immensely.

She softened, explaining, "Listen Derek, I just don't appreciate having you tell me someone I like is using me. And more than ever when that person has been nothing but nice to you….and," she looked down.

"It hurts…,"A despondent veil crossed over her features then.

He looked at her in this moment. Really looked at her. Her eyes, her face, her hair. She was beautiful in that soft glow of her room. And he had hurt her. Something so unspoiled and flawless. But she had said it. He _hurt_ her.

He knew he had done things to her in the past, but he always thought she knew it was jokes, pranks. He never imagined something like this actually hurt her. If he had known maybe he wouldn't have…

"I never meant…" He began.

"Honestly, It doesn't matter. You don't know Andrew. I do. It only matters what I know about him, not what you think you know." she said, looking in his brown eyes.

"I'm really sorry , Case," he said the word again. He never said 'sorry' to anyone and in the past five minutes it was spilling from his tongue. She was making it happen.

They stood across from each other, not knowing what to say. She smiled at him now. There it was. A genuine smile. He had accomplished it. There was the light around her, the sparkle in her bright blue eyes. He realized Andrew was right. She was everything he had described her as. Why was this just now coming into his consciousness? Why?

"Am I forgiven now?" Derek smirked.

Casey laughed, cautiously, "Don't make me regret it, Venturi."

"Yeah, I'm trying to be better, you know. I'm actually not even going out a lot anymore. You should be proud I've practically given up on all that," he recognized he wanted her acceptance, her approval. It mattered. And more than it should.

"That's good Derek," she commended him.

"Yeah. So maybe Saturday night, I'll actually let you rent one of your sentimental, sappy romance movies that you always want me to watch. I won't even hog the TV…I'll even watch it with you, if you want…without complaining."

She was confused as to why Derek had mentioned Saturday night. The party was then. He would certainly be there. Right? She couldn't miss this golden opportunity to annoy Derek. He had to be going, right? This was a huge party at their school. Not to be missed.

"Thanks Derek," she turned and began to straighten her dresser nervously, to occupy her hands. "But, umm, I'm going to the party at Sam's on Saturday with Andrew. So you'll get the TV to yourself this weekend. No arguments from me. That's good right?" She glanced up at him, silently questioning if he would be there..

Derek's eyes turned to saucers, surprised he spoke, "You're going to that…party thing?"

"Yeah, why is that so hard to believe?" She inquired, suddenly upset at his disbelief. Her face changed just like that. He lost the radiance, the luminosity in her countenance. He wanted to reach and and draw it back into her.

'All because I had to open my big mouth,' he thought, kicking himself. But still he couldn't stop himself, he continued on. Jealousy was taking over.

"Well, Case, I mean, you don't do that stuff. You stay home on the weekend. You study. You fight with me over the TV. But you don't party. That's not you."

Casey's content demeanor immediately halted, as her eyes blazed blue, "Cause I'm so boring, right? You think you know me? You know nothing about me. And what about you? Since when are you the resident homebody in this house, huh?"

"Since I made the decision to be. Why is that a problem?" Derek couldn't stop himself. Now he knew Andrew would be there with Casey. And it made him feel slightly ill.

"No not at all. Just knowing you won't be there makes me want to go even more. I won't have you hovering trying to sabotage." She said lying, fueling his anger.

"Well, hope you have a terrific time with Mr. Wonderful, then," he sarcastically relied. How did it go from pleasant to disagreeable in two seconds flat? She was so…so infuriating. Why did she do that?

He had to get out.

Derek walked past her toward the door, barely grazing past her and hurriedly exiting the room.

She was left standing in her room, alone and utterly baffled by Derek's behavior. One minute he hates her, the next he's sorry for his behavior, the next he's being the same jerk she's always known. She wanted to hate him so badly she always found an excuse to argue with him. Then she didn't have to face that perhaps she didn't detest him as much as she liked to think. It was easier this way.

But then he had to go and say 'sorry'. And she had to go start another disagreement. But why did he do that? Why did he apologize?

He never did that. Not for anyone. Especially not for her. Never for her.

the line for this chapter four title is from a song called 'my number' by tegan and sara.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"_Well, circle around and get yourself a better look…a better memory."_

Derek sat in his all too familiar recliner Saturday night with his chin resting on his right hand. He was uninterested in the TV, even letting Edwin take over remote control duties. This was uncommon for him. He never gave over the control unless something was not right. And something was definitely amiss.

All day all he heard was Casey's music blaring from her room, as she, undoubtedly, was preparing herself for the party tonight. He had struggled to stay in his room and busy himself with sleeping or chatting online, but that music she was playing, it just kept taking over his brain. Why wouldn't she shut it off? It wasn't the music, it was the fact she was getting all dressed up to go out, to go to this party Derek wasn't even going to. It irked him.

He had all he could take and had made a trek downstairs to his recliner, where he now sat, dazed. He could only faintly hear the music now, but he still couldn't concentrate on anything else. Then he heard it shut off.

'Must be time for the Andrew the Great to arrive,' he thought. Then the doorbell rang as if on cue. But he didn't budge from his position in his chair. There was no way he was answering that door.

The bell chimed again.

Nora called out from the kitchen, "Kids can one of you get that, please!"

Edwin looked to Derek, who sat blankly staring at the TV set. No emotion crossed his features. "Uh, Derek, the door…"

"Casey can get it, it's for her anyway…" he replied snidely. Edwin just sighed and moved to get up and answer it himself. But Casey, of course came bounding down the stairs.

She was grinning from ear to ear, "I'll get it. It's for me…" Edwin plopped back down onto the sofa, surfing the channels once more.

Derek could hear Casey's ecstatic voice echoing from the foyer. "Andrew! Hey! Let me get my jacket and I'll be right back down. Ok?"

"Sure thing, Case," Derek could hear Andrew's voice wrap around her name. That name. Like he invented it. 'God, he is so smug,' he thought.

Derek didn't even glance in his direction when he heard him walking from the foyer to the den.

"Hi Edwin, Derek," Andrew voiced, waving slightly, and walking over to sit on the couch. Derek narrowed his eyes as this motion. 'He's got some nerve…,' he wanted to get up and disappear back to his room, but stopped himself.

"Hi, Andrew" Edwin reached over and shook his hand. "So where are you and Casey going?"

"Just a party at Sam's. Should be good…," Andrew trailed off looking in Derek's direction. "So uhh, are you going Derek?"

He still hadn't even acknowledged his presence. He didn't want to, but just to shut him up he muttered out a stern "No."

"Oh…you probably have better things to do anyway," Andrew said. Derek lifted his eyes from the TV and shifted them at Andrew, none to kindly.

Just in time Casey walked back down the stairs carrying her jacket. She stood in the foyer waiting.

"Ok, I'm finally ready," She smiled widely at Andrew, who returned the grin. He quickly stood from the couch and made his way in her direction.

"See ya Edwin," he gestured, as Edwin nodded. "You too Derek."

Derek looked over at him wanting so badly to give his toothy grin a few blank spaces…But then _she_caught his eyes. _Casey._ In her small black skirt, pink shirt, knee high boots, and long wavy hair, with a little makeup…so this is why she was preparing herself all day. She looked good. Pretty, even. And he hated to admit it.

All the arguing from the past days flew out the window. She was there. And she was astonishing. This made him want her to get away from Andrew even more.

His eyes slowly scanned her. Why wasn't she this everyday? _This_ she was giving to Andrew, too…along with the kind, caring personality. What else had he been missing out on with her?

Derek wanted to rip his hair out. Why? Why did Andrew get it all? _Why_?

His thoughts were interrupted, as Casey spoke, "Tell Mom and George I left. Ok?" He couldn't answer. He was a little stunned.

Edwin nodded again, "Sure thing Casey."

Then she headed for the door with Andrew behind her. His hand rested on the small of her back. Derek noticed. And he couldn't stop the torrent of jealousy he could feel coursing through his veins. Again. And involving her. Like he hadn't seen her dressed up before, or with another guy…All those others had been boys he went to school with. He knew them already, knew what to expect. But now it really bothered him.

_Why?_

Casey walked up the sidewalk to Sam's house. She had been here so many time before when they dated. And since then because they had remained friends. She had managed to stay friends with the guys she dated. She didn't like to end things on poor terms. It just wasn't her.

But she also wasn't the type to go out on weekends to parties. Especially one's like this. The drinking, the girls and guys only looking for one thing. It really wasn't her. But she thought she wanted it to be. Oh, how she had envied Derek all these years for having the chance to go. And he always seemed so indifferent to it all. How could it not be exciting?

She would soon find out. She linked her left arm with Andrew as they approached the door. "Cold?" Andrew asked her, with evident concern in his voice.

"No, not at all," she leaned her head on his shoulder. Just then Sam opened his front door, bottle in hand. Glassy eyes graced his face, as he smiled broadly.

"Heeeeyy!" he slurred. "So glad you guys could make it. Andrew!…you've got to meet everyone. Come on." Sam began pulling on Andrew's arm. Casey looked at him frantically. She was silently begging him not to leave her all alone.

She looked around the room. Everyone was already drinking, or had been for a while, so it seemed. Even Sam was virtually wasted, she wasn't so sure she wanted to be here anymore.

Then Andrew interjected, pulling from Sam's grip. "Yeah, in a little bit. I'm staying with Casey for now…" She mouthed thank you, and he nodded. They began walking and chatting with various people. She soon found some girls to talk to while Andrew made his rounds meeting everyone.

Maybe tonight wouldn't be so bad after all.

Derek sat in his car. He was now in front of Sam's house. What was he doing here? He promised himself not to come. Tonight was supposed to be the beginning of him changing his life around. Not being labeled dumb slacker anymore. But here he sat. And he knew why. It was Casey.

After they left for the party, all he had accomplished was pacing the living room floor, then when it became annoying to the rest of the family, he went upstairs to continue in his room. All he could think of was all the trouble that was there. The drinking, the drugs, random hookups. And Casey had no idea.

It was so different for her. She was so out of that element it wasn't even funny. She shouldn't even be there.

"Not that I'm worried or anything," he said aloud, to no one but himself. "…But Andrew should have known not to take her. Oh that's right. He thinks he knows her. He has no clue about her." This was accomplishing nothing. He had to keep busy.

So instead he ran down the stairs, grabbed his keys, and headed out on the road. He didn't know where to go, he just needed to drive, to breathe. Then he ended up, here, at Sam's. In front of the very party where Casey and Andrew were.

He sighed turning off the engine. He didn't want to go in, but he didn't want not to. He battled himself on what route to take. But he had to know what they were up to inside. As if he didn't already know. He felt like he'd never get away from all this. Because he was here again, getting out of his car, pulling on his leather jacket, and walking to the door. So familiar.

He didn't bother to knock. No one would hear it. He walked in, and scanned the place. The scene played out as expected. Every party was the same. He began to wonder why he ever found this exciting. And he'd only decided to stop mere weeks ago. How things had changed.

Then laughter from the kitchen sounded. He reached the doorframe at the kitchen and stopped.

Casey?

There she was. But where was Andrew? He examined the room. No sign. She was standing at the counter with a group of girls. Smiling, laughing, no signs of drinking. But those girls, he knew them, they were not worthy enough to even be that close to Casey. She was like an innocent in a lion's den, he thought. Her luminosity would be dimmed by them for certain.

But he had to admit, that she looked like she was having fun. Sure, she needed more friends, but these people were not the one's she needed as friends. She could do better. So much better.

He was silently contemplating whether he should just leave or stay, when she found his line of vision. "Oh, no," he wanted to fade away into the smoke filled air. She immediately pushed herself from the counter, and toward him. He had no time to respond.

She thought she would be pleased to find him here. Perfect opportunity to annoy him, it was. But she was simply upset at what she thought was him once again trying to cause her embarrassment. She was going to stop him before he started.

"What are you doing here? Following me?" She loudly announced. This caused all the girls perfectly styled blonde heads to swivel in his direction, and smile, noticing it was Derek Venturi.

"You've got some nerve, Der-ek!" she continued her tirade.

He became defensive to hide his surprise, "I was invited. Sam's my best friend. If anyone doesn't belong here it's you. Where's Andrew anyway? Isn't he supposed to be here making sure you're ok?"

"I think I can take care of myself," she reacted. "Anyway, why do you care? Here to prank me?"

"I don't care, as you can see. And no, I'm not here to prank you…" Derek headed for the exit. He wasn't going to argue with her. The last conversation they had turned from kind to offensive in a few seconds. Not this time. He didn't come for that. To be honest, he had forgotten why he had come in the first place. But he did not escape without her following on his heels.

"Derek! Don't just walk away from me," she raced down the front steps of Sam's after him, grabbing his shoulder spinning him around to face her. "Then why are you here?"

She genuinely wanted to know the answer. For all the energy Derek put into acting like he didn't care, she knew he did. At least somewhat. He had told her he was giving up all this. Now he was here. And not to prank her…Then there was some other reason behind it. She wanted to know.

"Look, I was bored. Unlike you, I'm not used to be stuck at home on a Saturday. I had to get out of the house. Everyone is here. So this is where I belong too," he lied.

"Why do you do that Derek?'

"Do what, Casey?," he countered, in sarcasm, trying to counteract his true feelings..

"Act like you don't care about anyone but yourself. You're such a hypocrite, you know that right? You don't want me around your friends is that it? Afraid they might like me more than you?" She stepped closer to him.

"Doubtful that's gonna happen," he smirked, not moving away from her. She had no idea why he was there. She was so far away from the truth. It was her. And she was there with him. Andrew.

They were inches apart now. And she folded her arms across her chest and pursed her lips, "Well, then what is it?"

He bitterly let his next words move from his lips. He wanted to prevent them from escaping, he didn't want the weakness to show. But he couldn't hinder it. "Are you and Andrew, like…a _couple_ now?"

The question came out of absolutely nowhere. And her exasperated expression soon turned to surprise. Her stomach turned in circles, no, more like back flips. She opened and closed her mouth, unable to form words. What was he asking this for? Where did it come from?

"Umm, Derek, I don't see how that is your business…" she answered, nervously. She didn't really know the answer herself. Of course she and Andrew had grown closer, but they were hardly dating. It was in the early stages still. Derek had no right to ask.

"I'm your step-brother, I should know who you're dating, or _whatever_," he lowered his voice, spewing phony excuses.

"Please, don't play over-protective now. Why does it matter if we are dating?" she questioned.

He looked down kicking at the pebbles in Sam's driveway. His expression sank, his shoulders fell. "I guess I shouldn't care…" And he knew he shouldn't. Not like he did. Not in this way.

Casey shifted uncomfortably, feeling guilty suddenly for being so harsh. "It's not that, it's just…I mean, I don't really know how to define our relationship right now…" She couldn't believe she was telling Derek this. She was giving him what he wanted: an answer.

"Where is he anyway? He just left you in there alone?" Derek tilted his head toward the house. "You shouldn't be on your own with any of those people. You're not like them…"

"Derek, just when I think-" she began, starting to become irritated gain.

He backpedaled, knowing he had phrased it all wrong. "No, no…Listen, I don't mean it in a bad way, Case. It's just that…you're better than them. They don't even deserve to be in the same _room_ as you, honestly." He wanted to laugh at himself. He never thought he would be this nice to Casey. But he found he wanted to be nice to her. He wanted to see her blue eyes sparkle at his words.

She looked at him warmly, "Really? You think that?"

"I mean…I know them. This is why I'm giving all this up. Tired of it. Every weekend, same deal. You might think it's fun now, but it gets old. Don't try to change to become more like them or Andrew. You're not drinking, drugs, and hookups. You're…you. And they _will_ corrupt you…" he trailed off, looking at her and smiled. "And we wouldn't want that, now would we?"

She returned his smile, "No. No, I guess not. But Derek, I wouldn't let them do that. I have my own principles, and plans for my life. I'm not going to let them take it away."

He looked at her, "I just don't want to see you change I guess…"

She felt his eyes dance with hers. It was a feeling she hadn't experienced in a very long time. She was, dare she say Yes, she was. And here, with Derek, of all people. She never would have guessed.

They stood together for a period of time. Words escaped them. Only the distant hum of the party, and the sound of their breathing.

Casey wondered why she never saw this side of Derek. He could be so nice. Lately he was really trying. Maybe he was trying to change like he said. He sounded as if he wanted to. And he admitted he cared. He seemed to be making all the mistakes of kindness in her presence lately. First apologizing, now this. That had to mean something. Maybe she was rubbing off on him. She inwardly smiled. She hoped he was becoming a better person.

He didn't want to make direct eye contact with her, but couldn't stop it from happening. She was drawing him in. Making his mind form phrases that he never thought he'd think, let alone say, to her. No matter what he didn't want these people he knew to change her. Of course she irritated him, drove him up the walls, and was so difficult, but it made her Casey. She was like an beacon of light when she smiled. They would take it, and burn it out. He wanted to keep it, not watch it fade. He smiled at his thoughts, for once, he didn't feel guilty.

They hadn't moved from their very close proximity. And they didn't seem to realize the currents of tension coursing between them. If they had they would have certainly jolted apart at the revelation. But it _was_ there, even if they had not yet recognized it quite yet.

But the moment was interrupted as Andrew's voice echoed across the front yard. "Case, what are you doing out there?"

"Nothing," she answered still watching Derek features, but he looked toward his feet. "Just getting some air."

Andrew stepped to the porch and stepped off, "Derek, is that you?" He recognized a figure with Casey. "I thought you weren't coming…"

"Yeah, well here I am. Too bad for you," Derek's defenses immediately shot up again. Casey's face fell at this. His demeanor gone so quickly was a loss she felt inherently.

Andrew looked from Derek, ignoring him, and toward Casey, "are you coming back in?" She looked at Derek, who hadn't make eye contact since Andrew came outside.

Derek echoed a response instead, "I'm going to get outta here. Have fun, you two." He turned to leave.

"Ok, have a good night then," Andrew waved at him. Derek and Casey's eyes locked. She didn't want to be here anymore. She wanted to go home. With Derek.

"You ready to go back in Casey?" Andrew put his arm over her shoulder, turning her toward the house. She answered affirmative, though her mind was screaming 'no'. Then they turned to go in. She looked once more back at Derek who was slowly walking to his car. As she turned the doorknob she sighed. She had no idea what just happened out there. But suddenly she felt the need to be at home like old times. Not here. Not with these people. His words reverberated, 'They will corrupt you…'

Derek stopped at his car before opening the door. He watched Casey disappear inside that house again. He leaned his head against the driver side window. What was he doing? He couldn't do this. He felt something back there. Not what he should feel with a step sister. He could hear her voice, 'Derek, that's none of your business.' And it very well wasn't, he supposed, but he wanted it to be. He realized that he didn't want someone _like_ her, he wanted _her. _He was I too deep now. He had to find a way out.

But he wasn't so sure he wanted to this time.

The chapter title is from the song 'Fools and Luxury' by Lydia.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, the characters, the show, the music, nothing.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"_I'm drowning in my miseries. It solves everything."_

Three weeks. It had been exactly three weeks. Oh, and two days. Derek could not forget. And not because he had been counting the days as they rolled by. But rather because he could feel the days. Lulling him. He had spent three weeks (and two days) avoiding Casey. He awoke on this 23rd day of silence & pulled the covers over his head.

/

After the party he had sat in his car what felt like the remainder of his evening. Then he drove. Drove to nowhere in particular. He just did not want to be home. Across the hall from where Casey slept. Where she wasn't there. While she was at that party...with...with that guy.

His name. He hated it. Why bother to speak it?

Pulling in the drive. Stepping through the doorway. Trudging up the staircase. Glancing into Casey's bedroom, where she had left a lamp softly glowing.

That night had been a turn around for him. And not for the best. He felt an emptiness now. He strode into her bedroom and flicked off the light quickly.

'As quickly as I extinguish the light from her eyes when she looks at me. Like tonight', he thought.

Out of her room and into his. He collapsed into his mattress. Sleep called out to him And he obliged.

/

Three weeks. It had been three. Long. Weeks.

"Wake up!", Derek's eyes slid open. "Wakey, wakey Smerek!", Mart was now bouncing on the end of his bed. An exuberant grin splashed across her face.

"Hey Marti", Derek's voice sounded hoarse. "Why ya so happy this morning, huh?"

She jumped off the bed and landed clumsily and bounded out of the room.

"I'm always this happy Smerek!", she called out, almost knocking into Edwin who was making his way in.

"Hey Der-", Edwin was cut short.

Derek looked at him through tired eyes, " What? Can't a guy get some sleep around here?"

Edwin, exasperated, threw his arms up, "Hey, I don't care if you wanna come or not you're was asked by mom to come drag you outta here. So here I am. No dragging is gonna happen though, bro."

"Its Saturday. This bed is where I plan to spend the day. Any further questions we can discuss at a Later time," Derek pulled the covers back over his head.

Edwin once again threw his hands up and slid out the door, passing Lizzie on his way out. "I tried, Lizzie. If he doesn't wanna come...," Derek could hear Edwin's voice trail off.

Derek could hear the footsteps stomping up the stairs and steadily making their way closer.

It was his Dad. "Derek, lets go. We are not doing this. We planned to spend the day together, all Of us, weeks ago. You are not going to spend another say holed up in this room. Get UP!"

He abruptly pulled the covers off the bed entirely & threw them onto the floor.

Derek then sat straight up, "Dad! What the hell are you doing?"

"Excuse me?," George widened his eyes. "I _know_. I _know_ you did not just use that language or that tone with me. Get up. Get a shower. Get dressed. Whatever you need to do. But we are leaving in 20 minutes. With you."

George exited and Derek reluctantly sat up, pulled on a shirt that was thrown on the floor in a heap of clothes, and shuffled to the bathroom. He wanted a shower. He needed to wake up.

Then, there it happened...what he had tried to avoid for three weeks (and two days).

It was Casey.

She was standing at the sink, water running, brushing her teeth. He wanted to turn around and crawl back in his bed. But he couldnt. So instead he put on his best poker face...He rolled his eyes, folded his arms and leaned against the door frame.

Clearing his throat loudly, Derek spoke out, "Uhmmm could you take any longer to finish? I need the shower."

Casey's head whipped around so quickly she dropped her toothbrush. "De-rek!," she tried to curse at him through the foamy toothpaste that was still in her mouth.

Derek held back a laugh. "Might wanna...ya know," he motioned toward her mouth.

"Ugh," she bent down, grabbed the toothbrush and then went to to sink to rinse. "So glad after two weeks the first thing you say to me inadventantly gives you a laugh"

"Who's laughing?," he stood still in the doorway. He wanted to correct her on her miscalculation, but instead, "And its been two weeks? Counting the days, huh?"

He knew all too well how long it had been. More than two weeks. But didnt think she would notice. What, with Andrew and all.

"Not a chance," she countered, turning to leave. "And i'd love to stay and catch up but I'm heading to see a movie with the boyfriend."

Boyfriend.

Boy.

Friend.

Yes, the words sounded so much better separated.

Derek had to hold back from reaching out to grab her arm and stop her from exiting. Instead he tried to keep his reserve, "Oh, wow. So when did that happen? I guess it has been a minute since we talked."

"Derek, like we ever really talked. Plus, you dont even like the guy. Why would I announce it to you specifically. Thought you would hear about it around school," Casey seemed so flippant about this turn of events.

Derek opened his mouth to speak and was interrupted by Nora's voice, "Guys, come on! George is ready to go. What is possibly taking so long here?"

"Im taking a shower and I will be there. Everyone calm down about this family hang out," Derek exclaimed. "What is the BIG deal? I see you guys every _freaking_ day!"

Nora cocked her head a little, "We havent seen much of you or Casey lately. Happy you both have such busy social lives but it does well to see you're family and spend some time, as well."

Casey looked wide eyed at her mom, "Mom, wait, when was this planned? I have a movie date with Andrew."

Nora sighed, "We all had this discussion. Planned a week ago. Derek, get a shower. Casey, no date with Andrew."

Derek smiled. He wanted to high five Nora for that last comment.

"Mom!," he could hear Casey arguing with her mom as Nora closed the door and lead Casey down the hall.

Derek walked over and clicked the lock on the door. Laughing inwardly as he turned on the shower.

/

Everyone was already packing into the car when Derek made it down stairs. He opened the front door and called out to Nora, "Hey, I'm gonna grab a bottled water and i'll be there!"

"Can you grab Casey while you're in there?" Nora said, placing Marti into the car.

Derek froze, thinking, 'Wow, that was phrased wrong in so many ways, Nora'

"Sure," he muttered under his breath and turned to head for the kitchen. He opened the fridge and grabbed the water. He was not going to bother to find Casey. He really did not want her to come. He did not want to hear her yammer about Andrew the Great all day. Going along for this day trip was hell enough.

"Just so you know, I want to be going just as much as you do," Casey's voice sounded from behind him.

Derek turned to face her. She looked nice. More makeup than usual, though. He knew she had been prepared to meet Andrew.

"I'm sure. Rather be with boy toy," he spoke.

And there it was. That dripping sarcasm that hangs from his tongue. He wanted to push the words back in.

"Yeah," she did not flinch as Derek's words. "We had big plans for today. Ruined."

"Movies can be seen tomorrow, Case. Stop being so overdramatic," he countered.

Casey looked at him. She looked sad. Like someone had genuinely ruined her life. Her eyes shone with tears. "No, more than that, more than that..."

"What? More than what?," he was confused. "Andrew will understand."

Derek hated the fact that he was defending that tool Andrew. But there he was doing it to make Casey stop crying. To see that light once again. It had been three weeks since he had been graced with that glow. Had he missed it?

"Derek...oh forget it. You would definitely not understand," she spun on her heels to leave. She needed to talk to someone that was not Emily, and not Nora. She needed to talk and he was here, and he had been different lately. She thought that maybe...

"Wait," he reached out without thinking and grabbed her wrist. He immediately felt the urge to let go but he didn't. Casey looked down at his hand encircling her delicate wrist, and looked up into his brown eyes.

She looked nervous, he dropped his hand quickly and pushed it in his pocket, "Uh...hey...look, Case, you can tell me."

He leaned against the kitchen island. She inched forward and did the same. They stood side by side.

Three weeks. No contact besides passing each other on the way out the door. And here they stood. Centimeters apart. He thought it felt warm and nice to be beside her. He _had_ missed her.

Casey broke the silence. She was just going to get it out, "This was going to be mine and Andrew's day. We were going to spend the day at the movies, then go out to dinner and he rented us a nice hotel suite..."

"Woah!" Derek pushed himself away from the island. The warmth and closeness gone! In a snap. Just like that. "Three weeks and you're giving it up? Well that's fucking perfect..."

Casey's eyes widened, as she pushed herself away from the island as well. "Excuse you, Mr. Recovering Man-whore, but I can do whatever I please. This is why I said i didnt want to tell you!"

"Well, looks like Little Miss Perfect is being corrpted just like I said would happen! And where were you planning to tell Dad and Nora you were? Getting it on with tool bag?," he was fuming.

"Corrupted?," she couldnt help but throw her head back and laugh. "I hardly think waiting until you are 18 years old to have sex is being _corrupted_. It is called growing up. But you wouldn't know anything about that! You act like a child!"

Casey was beyond annoyance. Why did he do this? She needed advice and he had to make her feel like a child. She needed someone to tell her she was making the right decision with Andrew. Not someone to tell her she was not.

"Listen, you want me to tell you that you are making the right decision and i'm not going to do that!" Derek exclaimed loudly.

Casey was dumbfounded. He had read her mind.

Derek inched closer, "I told you before, the night of the party at Sam's, you are so much better than any of those people. Do not throw it away just to feel like you are 'grown up'. Casey, you are light years away from those people."

He gritted his teeth, "Andrew might be great, but this _won't_ last and you _will_ be heartbroken."

Casey stared blinking at him, "Why won't this last? Andrew and I are most likely going to the same college...and...there is no reason for it not to..."

"Same college?" Derek chuckled, "Give me a break!"

Casey wanted to slap that all knowing look off his face, "I made a mistake telling you."

"Damn right you did," Derek couldn't stop himself. "I do not want to know when Mr. Personality takes your virginity."

"Stop playing over protective brother and acting as if you are concerned," she spoke.

Derek felt out of breath suddenly. He lowered his voice and looked directly at Casey's blazing blue eyes, "I am not your _brother_..."

She felt unnnerved, voice shaky, "I...I know that...but..."

"Guys," Nora stomped into the kitchen. "Glad to see you two are talking...but you can chat all about your lives in the car! Let's get a move on!"

She shuffled them out of the kitchen.

Derek picked up his pace and strode ahead of Casey and Nora.

Derek definitely felt better that Casey was here than doing god knows what with Andrew, but it still ate away at him to know it was progressing. This Andrew kid had weasled his way into every aspect of Derek's life. Well, except hockey.

'Whatever,' he thought, as he plopped down in the car 'I hate him anyway.'

Casey glanced at Derek as she claimed her seat.

She had _missed_ him. She hated to admit it, but she had missed that sparring.

They locked eyes and both looked away.

"I'm so excited! Let's go,"Marti exclaimed.

Derek and Casey both leaned there heads against the window and sighed.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_"...If you ever had a real heart...I don't think you'd know where to start"_

"I'll be upstairs..." Casey called out over her shoulder, as she hurried up the stairs.

The remainder of the family had not made it out of the car, much less through the front door. But she had done her good deed for the day. 'Hopefully for the week,' she thought.

All day at the zoo. The zoo of all places. She abhorred seeing animals caged in any sense. But she had smiled and played along. She was able to spend some quality time with Lizzie, and that was a plus! Casey would be in college soon and would miss her little sister like crazy!

She had enjoyed that part of the day...but Derek had avoided her the length of the trip. Stayed with Edwin or played with Marti, but shunned her completely. It made her feel even worse about sharing her would-be plans for the evening.

She hoped he had forgotten and would not stoop so low as to spread the gossip. She, fingers crossed, would not be hearing about it all over school on Monday.

Casey pulled the strap from her handbag that rested across her chest over her head and plopped down on her bed. Pulling her phone out of her bag, she smiled.

"Finally some time to talk to Andrew..."

The instant she heard his voice saying 'hello' her eyes lit up, "Hey boyfriend!"

"Hey Case! How was the family day?" he sounded.

She shrugged, "It was...nice. But i missed you! I feel so guilty about canceling our date."

"Its alright! We have so much time...there is always another day"

He was so understanding and kind. What was not to love about him?

"Did you wanna hang out tonight? I am all yours the rest of the evening...," she flirted.

"Oh, Casey do not tempt me," he joked. "But yeah Sam & I were hanging out. We were going to meet his girlfriend and were planning on still going to the movies. A later show. I would love it if you can come!"

"Yeah, of course I can!," Casey was already up and pulling her handbag back over her head. "I will be there in 15."

Giving herself a once over in her mirror, she fluffed her hair and added some lipgloss.

She rushed back down the stairs, and into the living room where George and Nora sat.

"Mom, George, I am heading out to see Andrew and some friends," Casey waved goodbye and grabbed the front door handle.

"Have fun! And we had a good time today, Case. Glad you came along," Nora smiled at her daughter.

"Me too, Mom," Casey returned the smile. "See you guys later on. I will be home by curfew!"

"Be safe!" Nora watched her daughter leave and turned to George, "Well, at least we got them all for a few hours today."

"Yeah,"George laughed. "Derek was ready to leave the second we pulled in, too."

"Oh, well he didn't even tell us bye or where he was going," Nora furrowed her brow.

"He didn't tell anyone. He just got out of his and car straight into his and left," George said, as he picked up the remote and began channel surfing.

/

Derek had left the house in a rush. He did not feel the urge to have another talk with Casey about what she had opened up to him about earlier.

It just made him feel sick. But he knew...oh he _knew_...that she would not let it go.

It would spiral into a conversation about how she felt he was mean and unfair to her. But it was not about being mean or trying to prank her or get at her. It was all about how much he hated Andrew. How much he hated to see her mixed in with the crowd he gave up on. How he just knew Andrew was no good.

No good.

And the words would come out of his mouth and he would watch all the happiness drain from Casey's face. And this is not what he wanted. He genuinely liked to see her eyes light up. Too see her smile...

Just not at Andrew.

He needed to get his mind off of it. He grabbed his phone from the passenger seat.

"Sam! Hey man, whatcha up to?" Derek just needed to have some down time with a good friend.

"Derek! Where have you been? Do not tell me you are actually out of the house and living, breathing in the outside world? It has been weeks since we even spoke...much less outside of school!" Sam was shocked to hear his friend on the line.

Derek laughed it off, "Yeah, I was definitely in a weird place. But I was just trying to get out for a bit...What are you getting into tonight?"

"We actually heading to the movies later, if you're up for it. After that, not sure. You know how it is..." He chuckled.

"Yeah. Anything. I can meet you guys there..."

"Ok, movie is at 10. Text when you get there," Sam said, as Derek answered an affirmative and ended the call.

Derek had been out of the scene for close to a month now. Maybe this would be a way to slowly get back into his old friends good graces again.

'This could be a good night...,' he thought as he drove on.

/

Casey jumped out of Andrew's car. She was jubilant. He made her so...just happy. Just being in his presence made her a different person. Not lonely, like she used to be. She had friends now. Plus, a boyfriend, who everyone wanted. But she had him.

"I'm happy it worked out that we could at least see each other today," she linked his arm in his as they walked toward the theatres.

"Me too. And maybe I can convince you to stay out a little past curfew tonight, my little rebel," he winked.

She blushed, "Me, a rebel?"

He bent down and kissed her forehead, "I guess we'll see..."

Just then they spotted Sam and his girlfriend Michelle, with their friends Ralph and Courtney. They all waved hello and the girls quickly separated from the boys, to chat, while they bought the tickets.

"Ok, are we ready to go in...,"Andrew looked at Sam. "I'll tell the girls..."

Sam looked around the area, "No, we are still waiting for-oh there he is! Hey Derek! Over here!"

Sam was waving his arms above his head.

Casey heard the name. Her eyes widened, as she slowly turned from the girls, who continued talking.

Yes. There he was.

'You have got to be kidding me?' She thought.

/

Derek saw Sam's arms raised high and flailing. He was on the verge of laughing at this spectacle when he saw it.

Andrew?

Andrew.

_Fuck_.

"Hey Derek!" Sam wrapped his arm around Derek's shoulder. "So good to see you out!"

Derek looked at Sam. He looked at Andrew. Then...

"What are you doing here?"

Casey?

Casey.

He closed his eyes.

_No._

Sam looked at Casey, as he stepped beside Derek, and smiled, "I invited him..."

Derek and Casey both shot Sam a look of disgust. He put his palms up and backed away..."Sorry..."

"I would like to speak with you...," Casey lowered her voice and leaned closer to Derek.

Derek mirrored her body language, leaned and whispered, "I would _not_ like to do the same."

She shot her eyes up to meet his, "I just want-"

Andrew appeared beside her, "Hey Derek! Long time! Good to see you."

Derek looked from Andrew to Casey, who looked nervous and fidgety. And at that moment he realized she was terrified he would mention what she had told him earlier In the kitchen. She was silently pleading with him.

He looked back to Andrew and smiled through gritted teeth, "Yeah. Its just...just so good."

Casey smiled a silent way of saying 'thank you', and Derek nodded.

"Lets go. We are gonna miss the start!" Michelle chimed in.

Casey and Andrew fell behind Ralph and Derek, who walked in ahead.

Courtney slid in beside Casey and leaned in, "Who's your friend?"

Casey glanced over at her, "Not a friend, my brot-uhm my, my step-brother."

"Oh nice. You get to live with that? Andrew watch your back!" She joked and reached over the lightly tap Andrews arm, as he laughed. Casey shot him a look.

"Uh yeah Derek is a Douche. No tact. No moral compass. Just a complete wreck."

Casey tried her damnedest to make him seem absolutely dreadful.

"Oh," Courtney flipped her blonde, slightly curled hair over her shoulder. She walked up ahead and winked back at Casey, "He sounds like a good time."

/

"Wow! _Soooo_ good! Right Derek," Courtney had her hand at the nape of his neck, toying with his hair. She had done this the entire movie. But he had allowed it. Why not just play along? She seemed harmless enough. Plus, she was hot And he hadn't had any fun in a while.

Derek looked at her, "Yeah. It was pretty awesome."

Everyone had exited the theatres and were hanging outside, making plans for the rest of the evening. Sam edged his way between the crowd.

"So I know where we can go...you know...Derek, " he nudged his friend.

Derek shook his head, "Uh, yeah sure, but...Not all of us are going."

The group fell silent looking between each other. They all looked back at Derek, who had his gaze fixed solely on Casey.

She looked between everyone and pointed her finger at herself, "Oh!...Me?"

"Yes, you. Curfew," Derek held up his phone and tapped the large numbers reading the time.

"And who are you, exactly? I go anywhere I please!," she spit back.

"Casey," Andrew had his hand on the small of her back, rubbing. "Look we don't have to go."

Derek looked relieved, "So...who is riding with who?"

"I will ride with you," Courtney linked her arm with Derek's. Ralph agreed to jump into Derek's car, as well.

"And Sam and Michelle, we will see you there," Derek pulled his keys from his pocket.

Casey reached into Andrew's pocket and pulled out his keys, opened the palm of his hand and placed them there.

She turned to the group, "We will see you there."

She pulled at Andrew's hand and spun around toward the car.

Derek watched her walk away.

She really wanted to flaunt this newfound popularity in his face. She was part of this crowd just like he is.

Or just like he _was_.

/

Derek had led the convoy of cars to the spot. It was near the lake and where all of his friends always came to hang out, talk, drink and have some unsupervised fun. He hated that Casey was on the way in Andrew's car just behind him. He wasn't sure how he felt about the drinking around her, much less with her.

He put his car in park and hopped out. He surveyed the scenery as Sam walked beside him, "Hey Derek, I'll get the bonfire started."

"Ok, sounds good!"

"Who has the alcohol," Courtney chimed in.

"Oh, it is in my trunk, Court," Sam threw his keys in her direction. "You can grab it."

She grabbed Michelle's arm and led her to assist with grabbing the beer.

Casey emerged from Andrew's car and walked toward the girls, "Are you guys grabbing blankets? Need help?"

Courtney and Michelle glanced at each other and back at Casey and giggled, "No, Casey. We are grabbing the beer. But you can definitely help. Sam brought enough to last us until next week!"

Casey's eyes enlarged, "Oh, uh...I didn't know we were going to be..."

They weren't listening. Courtney held up a case and handed it to Casey to carry, as they lifted out the cooler.

"There you are!" Andrew ran forward to help Casey with her heavy load. The other girls sat the cooler down.

Ralph reached in and grabbed a beer immediately, offering one to Derek, who grasped it firmily and turned it down instead.

'"Sorry, man gotta drive," Derek declined.

"Yeah, same for me," Michelle echoed.

Casey sat down with Andrew, but had not taken her eyes off of Derek. She was under the impression that he had given up this lifestyle of underage drinking and parties. Yet, here he was. At a bonfire and a blonde on his arm.

"Casey?" Andrew handed her a beer. She looked up at it in his hand. Derek eyed this exchange, glancing between the two.

"Uh, no thanks," she looked down.

Courtney appeared beside her with a beer she had poured into a cup. "Casey, drink up. Live a little."

Casey continued to stare at the cup before reaching out and wrapping her delicate fingers around the exterior. This was rebellion.

"Case..." She could feel Derek's gaze on her as he said her name. She made eye contact with him and tipped the cup to take a drink.

'Corruption,' he thought, blinking at her. There was no stopping it. She was here. She was with Andrew. Somehow she had become accepted into this group. And he felt like the outsider, telling her how bad it was to be with these people. And all the while, he was doing the same. He was a hypocrite.

Casey lowered her cup, glanced at him haughtily and looked away.

/

Nearly two hours had passed. It was close to 2am. but Casey did not seem to notice. She had continued to drink. She was now tipsy. First time. She felt free. She felt like a different, more outgoing, part of herself had emerged.

She was laughing and flirting with Andrew, but all the while she was watching everyone else. Especially, Derek. Courtney was at his side. Attached. Laughing. Giggling.

Casey wished he was not here. He was a nuisance to her. He had not wanted to come and have any fun.

Rude.

But she was happy he was there to see her. Having fun. With _his_ friends. She was just as popular as him...

Derek, could feel her eyes on him. Through the bonfire flames he could see her. Hazy eyes. It was not from the smoke. First time drinker. He could always spot them. Not that it was too hard with Casey. He knew.

"Guys, I think we need to head back," Sam announced, as he began extinguishing the remainder of the fire. Everyone groaned and gathered their things.

"Sam, are you ok to drive?" Derek asked, concerned.

Michelle spoke up, "Nah, I can drive. And I will take Court and Ralph, as well."

Courtney looked sad that she was not able to go with Derek. She leaned over and whispered in his ear.

He shook his head, and smiled that sly grin, "Definitely another time." She giggled.

Casey rolled her eyes.

"Andrew, Casey, wanna jump in and I can take ya home?" Michelle offered.

Andrew nodeed his head 'no' and put his arm over Casey's shoulder.

"Case and I can drive home," Andrew slurred.

"Nope. Casey can ride with me," The entire group turned. It was Derek.

Casey laughed, loudly. They all looked back at her.

"Nope! Nooooo...," she was shaking her head.

"It is not a question, Case. It makes sense. We live in the same house," Derek walked over and gestured to her to follow him.

She refused and folded her arms across her chest.

"Casey, it does make sense," Andrew nodded down at her, slowly. "Plus, I really shouldnt drive, I guess."

She actually thought she hated him right now. Why would he make her leave with Derek?

"Ok, fine. See you tomorrow, Andrew" she pulled from him and stomped to Derek's car and flung open the door, slamming it shut.

"See you guys later," Derek called back at them, feeling triumphant, as he headed toward his car.

"Keep care of her, Derek," Andrew called out.

Derek did not look back.

/

She did not look at him the entire ride home. She sat with her arms folded, still. Staring off, still hazy eyed. When they pulled up to the curb of their house, she was out almost immediately. She stumbled a bit.

"Casey, you can't move that fast. You are drunk. You are going to make yourself sick," He was beside her now. "Plus, dad and Nora will wake up if you go in there stumbling all over the house."

She looked up at him to shoot him a look and saw him smiling, laughing. "This is not funny, Venturi! This is your fault!"

"Me? Oh, I forgot that I poured the beer down your throat and made you drink it," he laughed again. "I told you not to come."

She sat down on the grass. He wanted to laugh at her. Sober Casey would never do this. Sit her nice clothes in the grass, risking a stain. She would be so mad at herself in the morning.

"I was mean to Andrew," she picked at the grass. "I knew he shouldn't be driving. Why was I mean?"

Derek looked at her, "You aren't yourself. You are drunk, Case."

"I fit in though right? It makes you mad, right?" She questioned, smiling mischeviously, looking at his expression.

"Is that what this is?" Derek looked annoyed, sighing, as he sat down beside her. "Making me mad, getting under my skin? You do enough of that already."

"Well, that is my goal," she smiled, and nudged him slightly. " And I am sorry I was mean to you. You were just trying to help."

She was no longer angry. Her mood had shifted back.

And then...

There it was. Even now she was glowing. Her eyes were hazy but the sparkle shown through.

She was beautiful.

Her hair was slightly disheveled and she sleepy.

Still beautiful.

He didn't want to look away.

"Why do you do that?" Casey searched his face.

"Do what?" Derek couldn't look away.

"You know what..."

Derek reached his hand up and brushed her hair from her face. He wanted to see her glow more clearly.

Her eyes traveled with his hands.

"I don't want you to get hurt. I told you that the night you went to the party..." He put his hand back at his side.

"I know," she wanted to understand. "Why do you hate Andrew? You guys could be friends..."

His name killed the small, nice moment.

"Ha! I very seriously doubt it, Case."

"Why," she tried.

She was reciting questions so quickly...she had lost her inhibitions due to the beer, he knew.

But, still, he was a little annoyed by this exchange, he felt he had explained himself clearly before. He sighed heavily.

"Casey. I told you. You are better than him. And it is not just him. It is _all_ of them," He pushed at the grass beside him. "You are better than this. Better than being drunk on a Saturday night at 2:30 in the morning, sitting in your front lawn, arguing with me about why I care about you at all! I should let you make the mistakes. Drink every weekend. Smoke weed with them. Fuck Andrew. It should not matter, but it _does_. You are better. You are..._you_. You shouldn't be changing in order to feel grown up, or to have friends. The real people in your life. The people who really care will be there. They are the ones who look out for You. Who would hate to see you change..."

He trailed off.

She sat wide eyed. She wanted to cry. He could see it in her eyes.

"Casey.."

"No," she stopped him, trying to get the words out. It was so hard to think in this state. "You do not get it. You have always been popular. Always been a player. It is easier to decide to give it all up and quit that life, than never having it to begin with. Trust me. Loneliness sucks. No matter how much schoolwork I involve myself in or how much time I spend hanging with Emily, it is not the same. No one understands. Not my mom, not Lizzie, not Em...I am all alone. Until Andrew."

He reached out and before he could think he had wiped a tear from beneath her left eye. She leaned her head into his hand.

He pulled his finger back quickly at that action. But looked back at her closed eyes.

"You are not alone, Case... I know I can be a jerk. But I get hurt. I get lonely. That is my reason for leaving that group. It is hard to feel alone in a crowd..."

He looked at the ground and began to pick at the grass, as well.

Now she felt the urge to reach out to him. Her arm reached around the back of his neck and spun her fingers in his light brown brown. He looked up at her. Courtney had been there earlier. He liked Casey's fingers there better.

"I never knew that bout you..."she softly whispered.

"I guess neither did I," he countered.

"Why didn't you leave with Courtney?"

"I left with you."

He felt relaxed.

She continued to move her fingers.

"Why didn't you leave with Andrew?"

"You insisted I come with you,"she laughed lightly. She still felt tipsy and blurry.

"And since when do you listen to me, of all people," he laughed, as well.

"I guess since I realized we aren't so different. Just on different sides of a coin," she leaned her chin on his shoulder. Hands in his hair and smiling down at him, his eyes at the ground again.

She was a different person. This was not Casey. He knew it was the alcohol talking. He knew, but...

"Don't have sex with him."

The words came pouring from his lips.

"Derek," her breath was in his ear. But he felt it down to his toes. "Why does it matter? It has to happen sometime...with someone"

"Just..." He looked into her eyes. She was so close.

So close.

"Just...wait..."

"Thanks for caring, but i will be ok, big brother," she kissed his cheek, then. She wasn't even sure why.

The word rang in his ear.

"Casey," he breathed. "I'm not...your brother."

They were so close. Breathing each others breath.

"I know," the words were barely audible.

Then...

Her perfect pink lips slowly inched forward and lightly touched his.

He could feel it. But it felt so unreal that it was like it wasn't happening. But the electricity shooting through him let him know it was real.

He kissed her back. It was delicate. He did not deepen it.

It was the softest kiss he had ever experienced, but so much better than anything else.

She pulled back and looked at him.

Stil, those hazy, sparkling blue eyes.

"Let's get you inside, Case."

/

Chapter title is lyrics from 'Coming Down' by Dum Dum Girls

:)

please review.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

_"If this is love then kill me now...and save me from my life."_

Sunday morning came too soon. Derek sat in the kitchen, hunched over the island, eating his cereal. He had not been able to sleep last night. His mind was racing. Thoughts circled above him. All revolving around one name.

Casey.

He doubted she would remember what had occurred last night. She was so drunk. Even beyond what she appeared on the surface.

Not much had happened, really. After their talk, he had led her up the stairs and sat her down on her bed. She commented that she felt dizzy, so he pulled her blankets back and instructed her to lay down. She did, and he pulled her blanket over her legs.

Asleep in an instant.

He backed away out of her bedroom and toward his room, where he would toss and turn for the remainder of the evening.

Not much had happened, really.

Right?

Well, there was that kiss.

That small, delicate, amazing, incredible kiss.

How to handle this? That is what kept him up all night...and what was spinning in his mind this morning.

He was pulled from his thoughts by his dad who entered from he and Nora's basement bedroom. He looked surprised to see Derek up so early on a Sunday.

"Good morning! What got you out of bed so early on a weekend?" George grabbed the cereal box in front of Derek and poured himself a bowl.

Derek groaned, "Just can't sleep. One of those nights, ya know?"

George nodded in agreement. "It happens. What time did you get in last night?"

"Uhh. I...by curfew," he didn't make eye contact.

"Ha! Ok, Derek...Try and keep that very convincing story to yourself," George laughed.

Derek nodded and slightly smiled, "Will do, dad."

"By that I mean don't tell Nora..."

Derek laughed this time and shook his head, "Dad...I got it."

The basement door clicked and Nora appeared, "Got what, Derek?"

Derek looked at his Dad and back at Nora, "Just ya know, guy stuff."

"Oh, yeah, I'm good with not knowing." she laughed and opened the fridge to pull out the orange juice. "So what is for breakfast?"

/

Casey woke up with a pounding headache.

The sunlight pouring in through her window seemed so much brighter.

She groaned. She felt like she needed to vomit. She sat up and her head felt like it was filled with water.

"Never again...why do people want to feel like this?" She spoke out loud, and rubbed her eyes.

She stood up and felt it again. She was going to throw up.

She rushed for the bathroom and shut the door. She sat on the floor for 15 minutes.

'Never again...'

Finally, the nausea had subsided and she picked herself up to head down stairs.

She could hear the family, or at least half of them, chatting.

And Derek.

She remembered last night vaguely. She had fun with Andrew and felt like she had been accepted into the cool crowd for once. But then there was that one part...being pratically forced to ride home with Derek and then pouting the entirety of the drive. Then after arriving at home...a blur.

She recalled sitting in the grass. Why? She just remebering the wet grass in her fingertips.

A memory of walking up the stairs and lying down. Did Derek help her up the stairs? She wasn't sure.

"Heyyy...Casey..." George's words trailed off as we watched her trudging into the kitchen. "Are you ok?"

"Fine," she grumbled, the dark circles evident under her blue eyes. "Starving though...Mom can you pass me the cereal?"

Nora was open mouthed.

"Mom. Cereal. Please..."

"Casey...are you...are you hungover?" Nora could barely form the words. Not her Casey.

"What? No! Me? Hungover? Yeah. No. Not at all..." Casey was talking too fast. She sat down in the stool beside Derek.

She glanced at him quickly. Derek knew that look. She did not know how to handle this.

"Woah, no she is definitely not hungover," Derek interrupted. "Unless she snuck in some booze last night after we got home. She was with me last night..."

Casey visibly calmed at Derek's interruption knowing that it quelled the worry in Nora.

"Did ya Case?" Derek gave her a quick side eye, and continued eating.

"Nope. I went straight to sleep," Casey poured her cereal.

Nora and George looked between the two, who were strangely much more interested in their breakfast food than anyone should be.

"Casey, if something is wrong...if you need to talk..." Nora began. "And since when do you and Derek hang out?"

Derek took offense to that and shook his head.

"Mom. I am fine. Not hungover," Casey matter-of-factly stated.

"Ok, well just letting you know..." Nora stood from her seat. "let's just change the subject, sound good?"

Derek and Casey both shook their heads, as did George.

Nora laughed, "Ok, so, George and I were going to go and spend the day together. If you need us we will have our cells on us, ok?"

Derek and Casey both nodded, happy to leave that conversation behind.

George gathered his spoon and plates and dropped it off in the sink, before he and Nora headed to get dressed for the day.

Once they were gone, there was silence. Just Casey and Derek left alone.

"Hey, Der," Casey put her spoon down. "Thanks for that. You definitely did not have to do that. Not after how I behaved last night. I want to apologize."

Derek was confused, " Uh, sure Case. You are welcome. No apology needed."

He did not want an apology for that kiss. That would mean she regretted it. And he was not sure he wanted to take it back. He might..._might_ have liked it.

"Well, anyone who dealt with a stumbling, annoying, drunk girl and didn't leave me out in the grass can't be all bad, right?" She gently nudged his arm.

Derek looked at where her arm had touched him. It was only an instant. But it was like he was hit with lightning. A shock to his system.

"Casey, you may have been stumbling and drunk but you were far from annoying..." He looked at her.

She was smiling until she made eye contact and caught his gaze. "What?"

"Just...I enjoyed last night," Derek looked back at his bowl. "I guess I just never knew you like that...and you were...sweet."

She blushed, "I was? I only remember being an absolute horror. I really should not ever drink again. First time is the last time. But I did have fun!"

He looked at her again. How was she handling this so well and he felt so nervous to talk with her about last night? He needed to ask. He needed to just do it.

"Casey, how much _do_ you remember of last night?"

"Well, drinking with you guys at the bonfire, then you taking me home. I do not even recall going to sleep. Then I woke up and...uhm...threw up," she stuttered out.

He made a fake disguted face at her. She alughed a little. But still...

"Oh...yeah, well..." he was completely dissatisfied with that answer. So she had no recollection of the kiss? Or was she avoiding it? She did seem much more receptive to him today. They seldomly spoke like this. Not really. Plus, he made her laugh. That was a nice change of pace.

"What? Did I do something stupid?" her eyes were searching his now.

He wanted to tell her. They way she was looking at him. She was such an innocent in so many ways. So frightened she did something more wrong than she felt she already had, by drinking. What would she think of the kiss? How would she feel?

"Oh. My. God. Derek...Did I?...I didn't..." She was searching him still. She hoped she had not done what she thought she may have.

He could not read her. Was she referring to the kiss now?

"Did you what, Case?" He probed.

"Ok, I'll just say it," she sighed deeply. "Did I have sex with Andrew?" She felt relieved to get the question out.

His eyes widened.

_What_?

His voice echoed his thoughts, "What?"

He shook his head and stood from his seat. All this and she only remembers wanting to have sex with that...that...guy.

_God_.

"Oh no!...I did? My first time and no memory of it?!" Casey's eyes welled.

Derek dropped his bowl in the sink loudly. Casey looked starled as he turned to look at her. Her eyes still watery.

Again with Andrew. This was nit about him. Not about him at all. this was about himself. And Casey.

"Derek," she cried. "How would you feel if you did something as big as this and could not even...just nothing? Not even a recollection. Oh, my god. This..."

"I would be ecstatic," he rolled his eyes and folded his arms. "And if you couldn't remember he must have _sucked_."

She was shcoked. Her tears gone now. Why was he being such an ass? Everytime. Everytime she tried to talk to him it was the same thing. Couldn't he just be...nice? He could go from cool to jerk in 2 seconds flat.

"Derek, why are you being such an asshole?"

"Excuse me? I am?" he leaned pointed his finger at his chest. "Far from it, missy. I took care of your ungrateful self last night. Not Andrew. You were never even alone with him. Not on my watch."

"So I didn't...ya know...with Andrew? Is that what you're saying?" She leaned her elbows on the counter.

"Nope."

"I would say thank you, but I doubt you would accept. You get so angry," she rolled her eyes.

Derek walked to the edge of the counter and leaned forward, the island between them.

"So, now you are fine, knowing you didn't do the deed? Guess that means you don't really want to..." He smirked.

"Wipe that smug look off your face, Venturi," she shot back, angry now. "Of course I want to, but I would love to remember it!"

"Please. I have plenty of proof otherwise," he locked her gaze. He knew she could not want Andrew. Not after last night. No matter what she thought she wanted, Andrew was not it.

"And, what is that?" She questioned, leaning forward a bit herself. "Nothing, that is what. I will be with Andrew. You have nothing to say about it. And we will live happily ever after. The end."

She shrugged and smiled to herself. She laughed a bit. She knew it was more complicated than that, but it made Derek squirm. She liked that part.

Derek did not care for the comment and stood straight. "Well. Maybe you should not kiss other guys if you want someone else so badly...what does that say? Huh?"

He knew it was wrong to say. He said it for spite and he instantly regretted it. But when he gets hurt, he gets frustrated. There was no way to stop it now. It had already been said.

Casey was taken aback by this. She had not kissed anyone but Andrew. Had she? But when?

She sat up straight as well, "I did no such thing! Take it back! You always want tosee me hurt! Why, Derek? Learn how to take a joke!"

"You don't seem to mind hurting me..." Derek turned to leave. "Who cares how Derek feels, right? I don't have feelings or anything. Nope"

Casey stood and grabbed his arm, "Hey, I'm sorry...I didn't mean..."

Derek closed his eyes briefly when she touched him. It had to happen. He had already practically told her. He could not hold it in any longer...

"Did you _mean_ to kiss _me_?"

Casey snatched her arm back quickly, and stammered, "Did I...did I what?"

Derek leaned against the door frame of the back door, "You heard me...Case."

This battle inside of him was waging now. He wanted her to know. To understand. To say hello to him and goodbye to Andrew. She was not at all receptive though. If this was how really, truly caring about someone made you feel, then he would like a one way ticket back, thanks!

"I didn't kiss you...I didn't." She didn't think so. But he seemed so sure, "Derek, if this is some kind of joke...it is _not funny."_

"Do I look like I am kidding," his voice was monotone.

"But why would I? I cannot even imagine what would make me...here you are lying again. Always talking about how you have changed recently..." She trailed off.

Derek shrugged his shoulders dramtically, "Wow! You act like it is just so terrible! Like you are just disgusted by it! And I have changed! For the better. I am done trying to be someone I am not. Too bad we can't say the same for you..."

"Woah! First of all, I am disgusted by the _fact_ that you would _lie_ about something so..."

Derek sighed and turned again to leave and Casey reached out and grabbed his arm again. She was not through...

"Casey," he growled. His eyes burned through her this time, as his voice slowed. "It happened. It is obviously over. Will never happen again. Now...Let. Me. Go."

Casey dropped her arm. He was hurt. She hurt him. She hurt _Derek_. She did not even know that it was possible.

He slammed the door and she jumped a little. She had really never seen him so upset. It was all over his face. Hurt.

She put her fingers to her lips...

It hit her like a punch to the gut.

"Oh god, I _did_ kiss Derek..."


End file.
